Respectable, middle-aged woman: I have considered becoming an alcoholic.
Devon
England
Overheard by: Jess
Respectable, middle-aged woman: I have considered becoming an alcoholic.
Devon
England
Overheard by: Jess
Little old lady: I’m not a Pina Colada type. Give me a Coors Light and a nice doobie and I’m good.
Women’s Gym
Studio City, California
Overheard by: urzzz
Black woman to child: You just mama's little white boy, aren't you? Yes you are!
Passing Hispanic woman: Is he really white?
Wal-Mart Parking Lot
Austin, Texas
Overheard by: Walk By Faster
Young woman on cell: I kiss my grandpa on the mouth, have I made out with him?
Palo Alto, California
Woman to girl: What exactly is a zombie? My son wants to know. Is it like a ghost?
Girl: A zombie is the living dead. A ghost is just a spirit, while a zombie is the dead body.
Woman: Like Michael Jackson?
Girl: Yes, like Michael Jackson.
Yarmouth, Maine
Overheard by: Jade
Overly friendly man on bus: It's like, for example, do you know how many seasons there are in a year?
Woman: Tweleve.
Overly friendly man: Well, actually there are four seasons, four seasons in a year, I guess…
Woman: Well, I'm not from here, I'm from Montana.
Seattle, Washington
Woman: I felt so bad. I was like, “it's okay, you can leave your pool cue there, come dance with me.”
Friend: And then you left him in the middle of the dance floor.
Woman: I didn't know he was blind!
Friend: So you blew him?
Woman: Did I?
Hot Springs, Idaho
Crazy old white lady trying on wedding veil: So I always wondered why I didn't look good in these things…until 2004.
Disinterested customer: Oh?
Crazy old white lady: Yeah, then I found out I was part Native American. At least 5%.
Disinterested customer (confused): Oh…?
Crazy, old white lady: Yeah. That's why I don't look good in veils. Cause we Native Americans don't wear them.
Disinterested customer: I got married in a courthouse.
Crazy old white lady: I hate to say it since I am part white, but damn those white people!
Goodwill
Altoona, Pennsylvania
Mother to toddler daughter: Would you rather I just say “testicles”?
Art Institute of Chicago
Chicago, Illinois
Overheard by: Brian
