Marine to friend: So, it’s like a long story. But basically my mom shot my boyfriend.
CostCo
VictorVille, California
Marine to friend: So, it’s like a long story. But basically my mom shot my boyfriend.
CostCo
VictorVille, California
Woman: I had this brother who, like, wanted to be spy so he could speak like speak ten different languages and go on top secret missions and crap like that. Now he works in a tile factory.
Borders
Sunnyvale, California
Ghetto woman #1: Oooh, I like them shorts.
Ghetto woman #2: I know, girl. My buttcheeks hang all out in them. I’m going to wear them to the club and find me a good man.
Wet Seal
Bradenton, Florida
Overheard by: Rae Crider
Well-dressed older lady: That’s definitely one of the better diphthongs.
Montgomery Street
San Francisco, California
Overheard by: Ladle
Woman on cell in bathroom stall: Well, I told them she’s only available for parties. She’s not just gonna come over and take her clothes off for anybody!
Rehm Pool
Oak Park, Illinois
Overheard by: A Lifeguard
Woman on cell: Bitch, I’m on the train. No, I ain’t ridin’ the bus! Have you seen the buses in this city?! Girl I wouldn’t get on the bus if fucking Harriet Tubman herself was waving a damn flashlight telling me, ‘All clear’!
On the Red Line
Chicago, Illinois
60-ish lady: If it weren’t for Dancing with the Stars, I don’t know what we’d be watching!
Whole Foods
Ridgewood, New Jersey
Black woman on cell: I’m telling ya, they took everything out of my breasts. Every fucking thing’s gone.
Outside Fogg Art Museum
Cambridge, Massachusetts
Overheard by: Don’t want to know what.
Angry woman on cell: I told you — we have Bible study in a half-hour! Get your clothes on and get off of the computer!
Locust Street
Harrisburg, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: Eavesdropper
