Woman: Do you have mothballs?
CVS employee: (after thinking for a few seconds) Is that a protein bar?
Washington, DC
Overheard by: Nana
Woman: Do you have mothballs?
CVS employee: (after thinking for a few seconds) Is that a protein bar?
Washington, DC
Overheard by: Nana
Gay boy: … And I woke up and my room was filled with red buttons and ears of corn, then my comforter turned into a giant lake, and three purple rhinoceroses just like rose out of it! And–
Girlfriend #1: No, Christian, there is no such thing as rhinoceroses. The plural of “rhinoceros” is “rhinocerii”.
Girlfriend #2: Stacy… I don’t think that’s right… I think it may be “rhinos-“
Girlfriend #1: Courtney, that’s ridiculous, we’re being serious here…
Gay boy: Okay, guys! It doesn’t matter. Anyway, back to the story… The weirdest part is, after all that happened, I thought I liked girls…
Girlfriend #1 and girlfriend #2: Wow… That is strange…
Huntington Movie Theater
Long Island, New York
Overheard by: Mo
Chemistry professor, demonstrating suction filtration: … And you have to stop the cock before you turn on the water, or it will just [frantic hand motion] come all over your face.
Smith College
Northampton, Massachusetts
Overheard by: amused non-major
Girl on cell to guy with glasses: Oh! Megan found your pants!
Guy with glasses, doing jazz hands: Yay!
Seattle, Washington
Overheard by: What…?
Spanish professor: Fuck Spanish.
Indiana University
Overheard by: Mierdita
Professor: So Hamlet basically just called Claudius a mother-copulator. See, I can say that. Mother-copulator.
Memorial University
Newfoundland
Canadia
Overheard by: Mel
Latin professor: Can anyone use a Latin interjection in a sentence?
Student: Lo! Look at that angel!
Latin professor: Yes, that is a very common interjection.
University of Denver, Colorado
Young woman: Then I read that conversation with… Oh, brain fart… You know, that news anchor? Anyway, that's when I decided unsweetened coffee was the mark of the usurper.
Hampton Bays
New York
