Now If Only She Could Find the U.S. on a Map

Old man, about Jessica Simpson “how I found love again” mag cover: She can't find someone to lighten her roots, but she found love. Thank god.

Mamaroneck, New York

Overheard by: Melissa

Posted on December 1, 2014
About celebrities, Beauty, Feelings, New York, Old folks

…After Those Pictures Surface of Him in the Cone-Bra

Middle-aged Jewish lady with thick Queens accent flipping through People magazine: So, what do you think about this whole thing with Madonna?
90-year-old man sitting next to her: Who?
Middle-aged Jewish lady: Madonna.
Man: Who?
Middle-aged Jewish lady: Madonna.
Man: Who?
Middle-aged Jewish lady: Madonna!
Man: Oh! The colored guy! Yeah, I don't think he'll win.

Jetblue Flight
Florida to New York

Overheard by: JoeQ

Posted on November 29, 2014
About celebrities, Airports & flights, Default, Florida, Jews, New York, Old folks, Questions

Do Shut Up and Finish Your Propofol, Darling

Seven-year-old boy: How did Michael Jackson die?
Mother: He had too many tablets and his heart stopped.
Seven-year-old boy: I'd like that to happen to Justin Bieber.

Hertfordshire
England

Overheard by: Corbin

Posted on November 27, 2014
About celebrities, Death & dying, England, Kids, Moms, Questions, Wishes

Didn't He Die?

Loud, livid woman barging through the crowd, completely serious: Move it! Get out of my way, I have to make pizza for Patrick Swayze!

Farmers Market
Culver City, California

Overheard by: Anon Y. Mouse

Posted on November 10, 2014
About celebrities, California, Food, Women

And Will, Too, At The Drop Of a Hat

Seven-year-old boy: Jonas Brothers! The Jonas Brothers can suck my ass!

Borders
Austin, Texas

Overheard by: Amy D

Posted on November 9, 2014
About celebrities, Ass, Glad the condom broke, Gripes, Insults, Kids, Music, Texas

Sugar Bear Is Next

Serious philosophy teacher: Captain Crunch has been raped.

High School
Bethesda, Maryland

Overheard by: clementine

Posted on November 8, 2014
About celebrities, Crimes, Default, Internet, Maryland, School [Elem., Middle, & High], Teachers, Violence

Daniel Radcliffe: It Was Lipstick, Actually

Lady suit: I hate to say it, but Harry Potter’s penis is small.
Hipster girl: What! Nooo!
Lady suit: No, really — it is. He got an erection on stage… and it was just sad. But the weirdest part is that it was bright red, like they had put blush on it or something.
Hipster girl: What the fuck?! My dreams are ruined!

http://overheardinthevalley.blogspot.com/2007/03/goblet-of-fire.html