Math professor #1: Don't derive like my brother.
Math professor #2: No, don't derive like my brother!
Northampton, Massachusetts
Overheard by: TARDIS Dyke
Math professor #1: Don't derive like my brother.
Math professor #2: No, don't derive like my brother!
Northampton, Massachusetts
Overheard by: TARDIS Dyke
Guy holding another in headlock and punching him in the face, shouting across road to immensely fat girlfriend: Charl! Get that fucking taxi! We gotta get home or the babysitter'll want extra pay.
Leamington Spa
England
Overheard by: Bleep
Young thug #1: I'm telling you, man, if they get you for jaywalking or littering down here, they just dismiss it.
Young thug #2: Really?
Young thug #1: Yeah, man, the homeless do it all the time.
Young thug #2: Man…
Young thug #1: I'm telling you. That's why I stay downtown.
Elevator
Los Angeles Superior Court
California
Overheard by: Mylinda
Drunk 20-something, yelling in a crowd: Because I am a grad student and I don't do anything!
Older woman: You know there are some attractive young men over by the band.
Drunk 20-something: Well, I do do that.
Cincinnati, Ohio
Eight-year-old boy to eight-year-old girl: You have to go to college! Otherwise you'll have to work in the poop factory!
Eight-year-old girl: There's no such thing as the poop factory!
Six-year-old brother: Yes there is! Remember?
Portland, Oregon
Guy: I'm going to sneeze!
Girl, getting in his face: Think about bananas! Think about bananas! You won't sneeze.
Religion professor: Just like thinking about bananas won't get you pregnant…
College
Rock Island, Illinois
Overheard by: I like bananas….
Boyfriend, quietly to girlfriend: You put the lime in the coconut, and dunk your balls in.
Dupont Circle
Washington, DC
Thug in shadows: But when you pee on a rock it bounces back at you!
Ridgewood, New Jersey
Furious hobo in tie-dye to frightened college student: You know why girls wear perfume and makeup? Because they're ugly and they stink! God bless you.
Berkeley, California
Man, hitting himself in the head with cell phone: I'm not giving you your fuckin' phone back until you fuckin' go to your fuckin' psychiatrist and take your fuckin' pills!
Woman: Give me my phone.
Man: I'll smash your phone on my head!
Woman: Give me my phone!
Man: Go to your fuckin' psychiatrist! Get your fuckin' pills!
Toronto
Canadia
