After a Nasty Court Battle, She Got the Egg Back

Crazy English professor: Now, Herrick — his poems are like eggs… I used to have an ostrich egg… I knew the ostrich, too… Not that it makes any difference.

Birmingham-Southern College
Birmingham, Alabama

Overheard by: poetrywhat?

Posted on May 7, 2020
Alabama, Animals, Colleges & Universities, Teachers

Must Be Blowfish

NASA intern guy #1: I think your fish are gay… Like, 99 percent sure. Look, they’ve got vertical bars.
NASA intern guy #2: They so want each other.
NASA intern guy #1: They do. And it’s not unrequited. Look, they both have vertical bars!

NASA Ames Research Center
Silicon Valley, California

Posted on April 20, 2020
Animals, California, Coworkers, Default, Sexuality

…According to Perez.

Small child to father: You're a sad puppy that burps. You're a stinky puppy that's sad… and burps.

http://overheardinpdx.blogspot.com/2008/09/daddys-little-girl.html

Overheard by: elizabeth

Posted on April 17, 2020
Animals, Burping & farting, Compare and contrast, Family ties, Overheard in PDX, Should have used a condom

Plus, That’s Chicken

20-something guy, about his sushi: This takes me back to when I used to live in Japan.
Brunette: When did you ever live there?
20-something guy: No, I mean in my past life.
Brunette: What makes you think you were Japanese?
20-something guy: Because ever since I was little I have always loved seafood.
Brunette: … Maybe you were a fish.
20-something guy: Not cool.

Sushi restaurant
Worcester, Massachusetts

Overheard by: Wallflower

Posted on March 18, 2020
Animals, Comebacks, Default, Food, Geography, Girls, Guys, Massachusetts, Memory lane, Restaurants

Though I’d Always Pictured You As More of a Titmouse

Suit on cell: Wait, while I’ve got you on the phone, what’s your animal spirit name? … Ah, ‘White Wolf’ — of course. All right, see you then.

Coffee shop
Indianapolis, Indiana

Overheard by: Baffled Bear

Posted on February 17, 2020
Animals, Default, Indiana, Names, On the phone, Questions, Suits

Fine, Call It “Guano” If That Makes You Feel Better

Man to son: Stop talking about vampire bats and focus on your poop.

San Diego, California

Posted on February 2, 2020
Advice, Animals, California, Dads, Default, Family ties, Poop

Squeaking While You're Being Felt Up Is an Added Bonus

Guy: So they would smuggle one of these toy dogs in their shirt pocket.
Girl: Why don't they just put them in their bras? It's like “yeah, I got a boob job while I was in China.”

Rutgers University
New Jersey

Overheard by: RU serious