Coffee shop girl: A pig is, like, a monkey's best friend.
Missoula, Montana
Overheard by: Evan
Coffee shop girl: A pig is, like, a monkey's best friend.
Missoula, Montana
Overheard by: Evan
Bearded elderly Irish tramp: Fuck you! Fuck you, you hellspawn of Satan! You diseased monkey fucking dog wanking shitcunt!
Man, passing by: Pardon?
Bearded elderly Irish tramp: You heard me, you twat! You cocksucking pedophile wanker! (turning to passing woman) Excuse me my dear, I'm terribly sorry to bother you, but could you spare a pound?
Woman, passing by: Sorry, no.
Bearded elderly Irish tramp: God bless you! (turns back to passing man) Go fuck yourself, you cunt! I'll vomit on your fucking dog!
Leamington Spa
England
Overheard by: Bleep
Teacher to class: You never know what you're going to find stuffed in the head of a mummified crocodile.
Metro State College
Denver, Colorado
Fat hipster girl: Do you know we didn't even get to see half the animals?
Skinny hipster guy: Dude, they don't have any sexy animals here.
Smithsonian National Zoo
Washington, DC
Overheard by: Lola Carmichael
Young waitress: He hit a deer on his motorcycle?! That's like… running into a horse with another horse!
Eugene, Oregon
Overheard by: Picture that…
Super smart, nerdy-looking guy: No! If you hit a mammoth with a comet, it will freeze!
High School
North Dakota
Overheard by: marisawin
Drunk guy #1: So what you're saying is, we rip the spine out of a dog?
Drunk guy #2: Yeah, but then you put a robotic spine in. You could get a remote-controlled dog.
Drunk guy #1: Shit, we could control its bark function.
Drunk girl: And make it ski.
Leamington Spa
England
Angry woman on cell: That is the stupidest thing I have ever heard! (pause) How are you even still alive?! How is it that the process of natural selection hasn't weeded you out by now? How have you made it this far through life being that stupid?
Sugar Hill, Georgia
Little girl on merry-go-round, addressing her horse: Go left!
Upstate New York
Overheard by: Coyote
