Woman: I imagine that finding out you have a tumor is very much like finding out you're pregnant.
Los Angeles, California
Woman: I imagine that finding out you have a tumor is very much like finding out you're pregnant.
Los Angeles, California
Distinguished professor: I think I do sex next Tuesday, is that right?
Evolutionary Ecology class, University of California
Santa Cruz, California
Impossibly cheerful Australian: I'd like two scoops of coffee coffee coffee buzz buzz buzz buzz buzz, please!
Alarmed counter guy: Uh, do you need it?
Ben & Jerry's
Berkeley, California
Overheard by: Rose Fox
Nurse: Okay, so… Where, exactly, did you acquire these grasshopper heads?
Hospital waiting room
California
Overheard by: Niki
Student: I’ve got some good news and some bad news.
Teacher: What’s the bad news? That you didn’t do your homework?
Student: No, that’s the good news. The bad news is that I love you.
Arcadia, California
Queer, when Bible-thumping lady splashes him with holy water: I’m a faggot, not a vampire. There’s a difference.
San Luis Obispo Gay Pride Festival
San Francisco, California
Overheard by: Rish
Girl: So Natalie Portman is speaking tonight. I want to go.
Boy: What is it about?
Girl: Poverty, but who cares? It’s Natalie Portman.
Boy: Yeah, fuck poverty, she’s hot.
University
Berkeley, California
Teenage thug to passing woman: Hey yo baby! I ain’t gonna lie, I got a big dick!
Hollywood and Highland
Los Angeles, California
Overheard by: Has that ever worked?
Female student #1: You sure you want me to feed you this banana?
Female student #2: Get on with it, will you?
Female student #1: This thing's pretty big. I wouldn't want to choke you.
Female student #2: Don't worry about it. I've had much bigger.
Youngish professor: (raises eyebrows)
Female student #2: You think I'm kidding? I've had some pretty big ones. Think you can give me a bigger one?
Youngish professor (blushing): Um, possibly.
Female student #2: Well, I'd like to see that.
Female student #3: Um, are we still talking about bananas here?
Classroom
UCSC, California
Teenage girl on cell, with happy look on face: And I kept at it until it was the artichoke it was always meant to be!
Del Mar Fairgrounds
San Diego County, California
