Canadia

Young drunk guy: …but everything will be better once I break his jaw.
Friend: Yeah, word.

Toronto
Ontario
Canadia

Overheard by: bex

Teacher: So this equation is like a machine. You substitute “n” for “-5” and it gives you the product. It's like a sausage-making machine…

Math Class
Mississauga, Ontario
Canadia

Girl: My cooter smells like Zoodles…

North Bay
Ontario
Canadia

Girl #1: He's kind of ugly.
Girl #2: He kind of reminds me of a marionette because his cheeks are shiny and puffed up all the time.

Black Market Vintage Clothing
Toronto, Ontario
Canadia

Overheard by: kj

Dude #1: So yeah, Kayla* got me kicked off the ski trip because I gave her ten bucks to buy some food. And she bought scissors. Fucking scissors. And apparently I'm not stable enough to have scissors and they think I'll fucking stab someone with them. And she gave me back $2.48 in change. The scissors were from the fucking dollar store. They couldn't have been that expensive. Next time she sits on my lap in math class I'm gonna call her a pick-pocket.
Dude #2: Okay, great story. Now shut the fuck up. I missed half the fucking dialogue of Cloverfield.

West Edmonton Mall
Edmonton, Alberta
Canadia

Overheard by: Trying to watch Cloverfield

(outside the university library)
Guy #1: So you scored.
Guy #2: And I know the holocaust inside and out.

Halifax, Nova Scotia
Canadia

Girl to friend: I mean, they have everything. I don't need anything… they have gold, knives, drugs…
Friend: (nods in agreement)

Shopper's Drug Mart
Toronto
Canadia

Teacher: There was this black guy streaking at night. I mean, it's not like you could see anything!

Canadia

Little boy (pointing to a plastic butterfly): Mommy, what's that?
Mom: That's a butterfly. Do you like butterflies?
Little boy (timidly): No…
Mom: Why not?
Little boy: They hurt me.

The Mall
Victoria
Canadia

Teen girl #1: Ugh, I get so gassy when I'm on my rag.
Teen girl #2: I'm just gassy all the time!
Teen girl #1: Ugh, I know.

Toronto
Ontario
Canadia