20-something hot girl to friend: He tore off all his clothes, threw him on his back on the bar, then covered his nipples in whipped cream.
Denver, Colorado
Drunk male friend: What do you want for your birthday, baby? I can make it happen, just tell me what you want!
Really, really drunk birthday girl, pointing at someone else: I want in that guy's pants!
Norfolk, Virginia
Dude: Hold this burrito, I gotta take my clothes off.
Chicago, Illinois
Woman on phone: As long as she can wear it without showing her lady garden, then that's fine by me.
Christchurch
New Zealand
Guy: Well, it all started during the week that I was cross-dressing…
Leeds
England
Overheard by: Paul
Drunk girl: Look! I have salt stains all over my pants. I'm a car.
Saint Joseph's University
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
20-something brunette: I mean, what else are you supposed to do when someone shits their pants…drink more vodka!
Minneapolis, Minnesota
Overheard by: Chaser
Boy: Why do you wear that on your head?
Muslim girl, indifferently: So the aliens don't read my brain.
High School
Utah
Overheard by: I need one of those!
Fat drunk guy: I really like your shirt. It's very intellectual.
Girl: Uh, thanks.
Fat drunk guy: I mean, I'm in college, I like to think deep, you know? I want to make films. Deep films.
Girl: Yeah, that'll be cool.
Fat drunk guy: How old are you?
Girl: I'm 16.
Fat drunk guy: Oh, I'm 18. Well…I mean, I'm 23.
Shreveport, Louisiana
Overheard by: Elle
