Genetic Engineering Has a Long Way to Go

Preppy freshman chick leaving dining hall: So, life decision for today: I want to become a Gummi Bear!

University of Mary Washington
Fredericksburg, Virginia

Overheard by: Anna Deaton

Posted on July 28, 2015
Bimbettes, Colleges & Universities, Philosophy, Preppies, Students, Virginia

If Our Disastrous Trip to Thailand Was Any Indication

Frizzy-haired college girl: Are you seriously asking me to to sell myself so you can hitchhike to Sicily?
Friend #1: There are so many things wrong with that sentence.
Friend #2: Yeah. Like first of all, no one in Italy would want to pay for you.

UC Davis
Davis, California

Overheard by: Passing Student

Posted on July 28, 2015
California, Colleges & Universities, Default, Friends, Geography, Girls, Money, Offers and requests, Questions, Sorority types

…So We Had to Tend to It.

Guy: You abandoned me last night! Both of you, you and James*!
Girl: I'm sorry, I was feeling sick. And I told James* to go back to the bar afterwards, but then, you know, I have a vagina…

Saint Peter's College
New Jersey

Posted on July 27, 2015
Colleges & Universities, Feelings, Girls, Guys, New Jersey, Sex, Vagina

Or You'll Spill Your Wine

Spanish professor, as class leaves on Friday: Be careful driving when you drink this weekend!

Hanover College
Hanover, Indiana

Overheard by: whitney

Posted on July 27, 2015
Advice, Colleges & Universities, Default, Drinking & drunks, Indiana, Teachers, Weirdness

… That Was before Her Head Spun Around

Chick #1: She looks kind of…
Chick #2: Satanic?
Chick #1: I was going to say Ukrainian, but…

Allegheny College
Pennsylvania

Posted on July 26, 2015
Biotechs, Colleges & Universities, Insults, Pennsylvania

Why Does Everyone Keep Telling Me That?

Guy with soul patch: Don't German people always drive at 200 miles an hour all the time?
Girl in front row, sarcastically: I think you mean 200 kilometers per hour.
Guy with soul patch: It doesn't matter, they're the same thing!
Professor, calmly: If I go crazy and start a killing spree, you'll be the first one I get.

George Washington University
Washington, DC

Posted on July 25, 2015
Colleges & Universities, Death & dying, Education, Stupidity, Teachers, Washington, DC, Words

I Believe Fingerpainting and Paste-Eating Are Down the Hall

Dumb blonde: Wait, wasn't Columbus the first president? That's why we have Columbus day!
Professor, calmly: Get out, please.

University of Michigan

Overheard by: getout

Posted on July 24, 2015
Colleges & Universities, Education, History, Idiots, Michigan, Stupidity, Teachers

Everybody from the American South Takes English As a Second Language

Crying girl to friend: And my paper had all these, like, negative comments on it a-a-and then she pulled me aside and compared my paper to people who take English as a second language.

Virginia Commonwealth University, Virginia

Posted on July 23, 2015
Colleges & Universities, Compare and contrast, Default, Education, Girls, Gripes, Virginia

We'll Now Proceed to the Dining Hall for an On-Site Demonstration

Professor, discussing King Solomon's Mines: So they find the body in the cave, and it hasn't decomposed at all. Not such a strange thing, as those of you who've ever hidden a body in a freezer will know.

Carleton University
Ottawa
Canadia

Posted on July 23, 2015
Books, Canadia, Colleges & Universities, Death & dying, Default, Teachers, Weirdness

We're Going to Congress!

Student to friend: Just put the rape stick in the alcohol bag.

American University
Washington, DC

Posted on July 22, 2015
Colleges & Universities, Drinking & drunks, Friends, Students, Violence, Washington, DC, Weirdness

Colleges & Universities