Anally

Sociology professor: This course is cheap, but I'm expensive, so please make use of me.

Boston University, Massachusetts

Posted on October 31, 2022
Advice, Colleges & Universities, Compare and contrast, Default, Massachusetts, Money, Teachers

Which I Saw a Magician Do Once, Disturbingly Enough

Guy: It was like trying to pull candy from a baby.

West Island
Montreal
Canadia

Posted on October 30, 2022
Canadia, Candy, Compare and contrast, Default, Guys, Pop culture

And I'm Lactose Intolerant.

Teenage girl on cell: I don't get on with him at all…we're just like bread and butter.

London
England

Overheard by: Steve Elliott

Posted on October 28, 2022
Compare and contrast, Default, England, Food, Girls, Relationships, Teens, Words

And You Stole Me from a Playground!

Little boy, standing next to a car: Daddy, this isn’t our car! Daddy, what are you doing? This isn’t our car!
Man: Look, buddy, you’ve got to stop saying that when we’re in parking lots. [to a couple walking by] I just got a new car.
Little boy: No you didn’t!

AMC Theatres
Owings Mills, Maryland

Overheard by: they steal cars, dont they?

Posted on October 24, 2022
Advice, Compare and contrast, Dads, Default, Family ties, Fears, Kids, Lies, Maryland

See –Look at Her Go to Town on That Man’s Shoe

Little girl: Daddy! Daddy! Emma just kissed the shopping cart!
Father: She’ll kiss worse things in her life.

Hannaford
Yarmouth, Maine

Overheard by: Jade

Posted on October 20, 2022
Compare and contrast, Dads, Family ties, Girls, K-I-S-S-I-N-G, Kids, Maine, Siblings, Stores

She Was Like, “Your Dad Really Enjoys Puttin' on the Ritz, Honey!”

20-something girl to table of people: And I was like, “Whoa, mom–your nipples are like top hats!”

Kasey's Tavern
Chicago, Illinois

Overheard by: Sara

Posted on October 14, 2022
Bars & Clubs, Clothes, Compare and contrast, Default, Girls, Illinois, Nipples

Somebody's Husband Wasn't Properly Fed and Watered

Hipster girl to friend: I heard the most offensive thing in Crate & Barrel!

San Francisco, California

Posted on October 13, 2022
Compare and contrast, Default, Girls, Hipsters, Names, San Francisco, Sensory experiences

We Smell the Plot Of a New Indiana Jones Movie!

Mini-skirt girl: Her name is Pearl, so she's either an 80-year-old white lady from Connecticut…
Suit: Or an 18-year-old, French-speaking lieutenant in an Asian motorcycle gang.
Mini-skirt girl: Yours is weirdly specific.

Bridgeport, Connecticut

Overheard by: Agreed

Posted on October 12, 2022
Age and ageing, Compare and contrast, Connecticut, Girls, Names, Suits, Weirdness

So Another Good Thing Is, I'm Resourceful

Friend #1: We should all say something about ourselves. One thing good and one thing bad.
Friend #2: What about you?
Friend #1: Well, I have a good sense of humor. And I guess something bad would be that the other day, I slept with some person because I didn't have a place to stay, but in the morning, I'd forgotten his name…so when he went out his room I had to search through it to find some kind of identity card of his so I could pretend I knew it all along. His name was Richard.

Pub
London Bridge
England

Posted on October 5, 2022
Bars & Clubs, Compare and contrast, Default, England, Friends, Names, Questions, Sex

Thankfully the Stupid Seem to Always Die Off First

Environmental science teacher: What, in your opinion, is the most pressing environmental issue our planet faces today?
Clueless redhead, raising hand unsurely: Is it… The birds?
Environmental science teacher: Excuse me?
Clueless redhead: Isn't there something up with birds? Like, aren't they dying or something?
Environmental science teacher: Um… Thousands of different animals are dying…
Clueless redhead: Oh. I thought it was just birds.

High School
Los Angeles, California

Posted on October 4, 2022
Animals, Birds, California, Compare and contrast, Death & dying, Questions, School [Elem., Middle, & High], Students, Stupidity, Teachers

Compare and contrast