Girl #1: Eww!
Girl #2: Oh, what? You can talk about your abortion, but I can't talk about warts?
Ashland, Oregon
Overheard by: crystal
Girl #1: Eww!
Girl #2: Oh, what? You can talk about your abortion, but I can't talk about warts?
Ashland, Oregon
Overheard by: crystal
Announcement: There's a gray car parked outside, four feet into the street.
Older woman: It's mine. I don't park cars; I just sort of abandon them.
Portsmouth, Virginia
Tween: Should I get Fanta or cock?
Perth, Washington
Overheard by: shocked older sister.
Girlfriend: No, whenever we try to have sex it always ends in tears!
Albany, New York
Little girl, seriously: This is what I like best about elevators. But it's not the blood of Christ.
Cherry Creek Mall
Denver, Colorado
Overheard by: Lee
Sober girl: Look, all I'm saying is, I wouldn't fucking mess with her. She's clinically insane.
Drunk girl: But you know, I think she's really smart. There are those people, you know, that are so smart they're like actually crazy… Real mental, and we just think they're weird, but they're not! They have like, an IQ of 200!
Sober girl: You do realize that she drew pictures of her friends decapitated, right?
Wellington
New Zealand
Overheard by: Were they talking about the same person?
Guy #1: Dude… that joke went to far.
Guy #2: You know what was going too far, David*? Breaking into my house.
Bolingbrook High School
Bolingbrook, Illinois
Guy on cell, after an exam: It was like the big turd finally dropped, now all I have to worry about are little turds.
Louisiana State University
Overheard by: glad she went to class
Girl to friend: I ooze talent, like a pimple oozes pus.
Corvallis, Oregon
Sorority chick, discussing Shroud of Turin: Jesus was 14 feet tall?
Philosophy of Religion Class, Lycoming College
Williamsport, Pennsylvania
