Girl in party: And then I said, “stop the car! I need to ask that midget where he got his pants!”
Connecticut
Girl in party: And then I said, “stop the car! I need to ask that midget where he got his pants!”
Connecticut
Hostess: Your son and I were just talking about what he wants for Christmas.
10-year-old boy: Turkey bacon!
Gruff-looking father: You want turkey bacon for Christmas?
10-year-old boy, to hostess: He never buys any!
Gruff-looking father: Hey, if you want turkey bacon for Christmas, I'll get you turkey bacon.
Restaurant
Middletown, Connecticut
Girl: So Jack sucked my thumb today.
Friends: Really?
Girl: Yeah, he sucked my thumb, then wiped his snot on my arm, licked my leg, and told me he wanted to go to the office.
Simsbury, Connecticut
Overheard by: rehreh88
Five-year-old Spanish boy: Court! Court! Court! Court!
Frazzled grandmother: Yes, I know.
Courthouse
Waterbury, Connecticut
Overheard by: Colleen
Hot black chick: I don't know why you're so surprised… It's the same way I'd nail Lucy Liu and alt-world Neil Patrick Harris.
Nerdy friend: Alt-world Neil Patrick Harris?
Hot black chick: You know, where he's straight and really into black chicks.
Nerdy friend: Baffling.
New Haven, Connecticut
Petite, hip girl: Honestly, it's not that controversial.
Drama club kid: Yeah, it's just a woman saying “vagina.”
Connecticut
Overheard by: ernaynay
Professor: Isn't Jim just a perplexing guy? I read his stories and I'm just like, “what's wrong with him?” Jim, you're just stoned all the time, aren't you? Are you stoned right now?
Jim: No!
Professor: But were you stoned earlier today?
Jim: Yes. But only because I was hungover!
Hartford, Connecticut
Overheard by: Claire
Guy: Did you watch that Palin video I sent you?
Girl: Not yet. I have to take my pants off to watch it.
Bloomfield, Connecticut
Professor: Sometimes it can be fun to be teased by not getting what you want for a while, as long as you get it in the end.
Hartford, Connecticut
Overheard by: Claire
Painfully dull professor: It's not rocket science, but it's also not a marshmallow.
Storrs, Connecticut
