So I'll Grind Them Up, Snort Them, and Hope for the Best

Girl #1, holding up box of Kellogg's frosted flakes and reading: Oh, shit. Oh, fuck.
Girl #2: What?
Girl #1: There aren't any directions.

Clark University
Worcester, Massachusetts

Overheard by: jedusor

Posted on June 27, 2021
Colleges & Universities, Default, Food, Girls, Insults, Massachusetts, Questions, Weirdness

Fowl Behavior?

Woman: So, I want a small frozen turkey.
Meat guy: Okay, just right over here.
Woman: Ewww… What's wrong with this one?
Meat guy: Sorry?
Woman: Well, is something missing?
Meat guy: Um… No.
Woman: Well, what is this “grain fed” business??
Meat guy: Oh, that means it's fed with grains.
Woman: Oh! (picks up turkey and leaves)

Grocery Store
Ontario
Canadia

Overheard by: Matt C

Posted on June 26, 2021
Canadia, Customers, Default, Employees, Food, Offers and requests, Questions, Stores, Stupidity, Women, Words

And Then I'll Have My Master's in Evacuation.

Guy on cell, after an exam: It was like the big turd finally dropped, now all I have to worry about are little turds.

Louisiana State University

Overheard by: glad she went to class

Posted on June 25, 2021
Colleges & Universities, Compare and contrast, Default, Guys, Louisiana, Poop, Weirdness, Words

Hmm, Yeah– Maybe We Shouldn't Write Our Own Vows

Male student: This one time I pissed in a trash bag, and I stuck my head in there just to see how bad it would smell.
Female student: What?
Male student: It was so hot and I was like sweating.

Springside School/Chestnut Hill Academy
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania

Overheard by: spectaculore

Posted on June 23, 2021
Default, Pee, Pennsylvania, School [Elem., Middle, & High], Sensory experiences, Students, Weirdness

Austin Powers Was a Tedious Child

Irate child: No! You behave!

Fort Wayne, Indiana

Posted on June 22, 2021
Default

If You Require Further Explanation, You Definitely Need to Attend.

Hot chick: I’m having a fantasia party; I made it a facebook event: Are you going to come?
Clueless girl: Whats a fantasia party?
Hot chick: Its for like chicks only, you hang out, drink and buy naughty stuff.
Clueless girl: I don’t get it?
Hot chick: What’s there to get? You come to my place, get drunk and buy sexy, naughty things?
Clueless girl: I still don’t get it.
Hot chick: Holy fuck! Its like a Tupperware party -only with dildos!

Ottawa
Ontario
Canadia

Overheard by: Make Mine 9 Inches!

Posted on June 21, 2021
Canadia, Chicks, Default, Drinking & drunks, Friends, Girls, Internet, Leisure, Shopping, Toys, Words

Now Finish Your Pop Rocks and Soda, and Let's Go Home

12-year-old girl to younger sibling: Every time you buy a Barbie they give money to the abortion place to give someone like a scholarship for an abortion. Every time you touch a barbie, it's like touching an abortion.

Toy Store
San Francisco, California

Overheard by: i now want to touch a barbie

Posted on June 20, 2021
California, Default, Girls, Kids, Shopping, Stores, Toys

…And That He Watches According to Jim??

College sorostitute: Well, I thought we'd been dating for, like, 3 months. But then I looked at his Facebook profile, and it said “single.”
Non-slutty college friend: You had to use Facebook to…
College sorostitute: Also, did you know he had a kid?

Charleston, South Carolina

Overheard by: Nuddles