Joe Camel's Conquests Never Get Over Him

Girl #1, giggling hysterically in changing room: I didn't know you had such a big camel toe!
Girl #2: I saw someone once with a camel toe from the front way up to the back of her ass.

Alberta
Canadia

Overheard by: Cathy

Posted on June 1, 2015
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Eerily, He Did

Tourist baby: Bah bah bah bah bah!
Tourist dad, changing his diaper: I hear ya.
Tourist baby: Bah bah bah bah bah bah!
Tourist dad: Uh huh.
Tourist baby: Bah bah bah bah!
Tourist dad: I told you not to mess with those guys.
(tourist baby laughs)
Tourist dad: Yeah, you know what I'm talking about!

Restroom, Walt Disney World
Orlando, Florida

Overheard by: The Normie in the Handistall

Posted on June 1, 2015
Dads, Default, Family ties, Florida, Happiness, Health & Hygiene, Kids, Tourist attractions

So I No Longer Let My Children Have Co-Ed Slumber Parties

Laughing man: Yeah, a lot of kids were conceived that night, especially after they broke out the crotchless panties.

Watkins Glen, New York

Posted on June 1, 2015
Clothes, Default, Guys, Kids, New York, Pregnancy, Sexuality

You'd Think the Pope Would Be a Better Driver

Girl #1: Oh my god, it's him! (waves enthusiastically to an approaching car) Isn't he amazing?
Girl #2: He almost ran you over.
Girl #1: It doesn't matter, as long as he's on top of me!

Silicon Valley, California

Posted on June 1, 2015
California, Compliments, Default, Girls, Sexuality, Stupidity, Words

To Be More Specific: Your Nipple Is Showing.

Microsoft male employee: So, did you stimulate a lot of people today?
Shocked and confused female barista: I'm sorry, what was that?
Microsoft employee: I bet you stimulated a lot of people today… They must love you!
Barista: Oh… Um…I dunno.

Redmond, Washington

Posted on May 31, 2015
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Which Was the Thesis of My Last Biology Paper

Thug #1: Everybody calls that girl “Orangutan titties.”
Thug #2: What? Why?
Thug #1: She's the one that flashed everybody back in freshman year at that one assembly, and her titties be all pointy and shit.
Thug #2: I remember that shit, that was pretty fuckin' funny.
Thug #3 (after a long pause): Man, orangutans are fuckin' weird.
Thug #1: Yeah, monkeys be fucked up.

MDN High School, Tempe, Arizona

Overheard by: I saw this whole assembly thing, too.

Posted on December 8, 2014
Animals, Arizona, Compare and contrast, Default, Friends, Names, Nipples, School [Elem., Middle, & High], Thugs, Weirdness

Is That a Multiple Choice Question?

Hooker, yelling at pimp in parked car: Lemme axe you somethin: fuck you!

Chicago, Illinois

Overheard by: rob w.

Posted on December 8, 2014
Default, Employees, Girls, Illinois, Insults, Offers and requests, Words

Tonight's Movie: Who Named Roger's Rabbit?

Guy, disagreeably to friends: You can't name a bunny “Mufasa”!

Denny's
St. Louis, Missouri

Posted on December 8, 2014
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To Be Fair, No One's First Job Interview Goes Well

Man in bathroom on cell: Hang on a sec, I am going someplace quieter. (a few seconds later) Damn, hang on. I just peed on my hand.

http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/overheardinminneapolis/~3/443767925/nobody-saw-that-coming.html

Overheard by: did they know you were in the bathroom? Ewww.

Posted on December 7, 2014
Default, Guys, Hands, Health & Hygiene, Overheard in Minneapolis, Pee, Weirdness

Like Sand on the Beach, So Are the Balls Of Our Lives

Gay #1: One guy likes to have his junk stepped on, but no punches in them.
Gay #2: Ow!
Gay #1: I don't like balls in my toes, though.
Gay #2: Just think of it as sand on a beach!

Starbucks
Somerville, Massachusetts

Overheard by: Scott

Posted on December 7, 2014
Balls, Body parts, Compare and contrast, Default, Gays, Massachusetts, Penis, Restaurants

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