So Then They Both Went Out for Fro-Yo

20-something girl at bar: So then Steve went to Danny's house, and he had to break his legs, cos…you know…
Friend: Yeah, that's a shame.

Brighton
England

Posted on April 28, 2009
Bars & Clubs, Body parts, Default, England, Friends, Girls, Gossip, Violence

He's Really More Of a Northerner

Crazy man #1: Are you from Mexico or Switzerland?
Crazy man #2: I am from Georgia! From the mountains.
Crazy man #1: North Georgia?
Crazy man #2: No, the mountains.
Crazy man #1: Are you friends with Santa Claus?
Crazy man #2: No, me and Santa don't get along.

Marta Train
Atlanta, Georgia

Overheard by: Jessica

Posted on April 27, 2009
Crazies, Default, Geography, Georgia, Guys, Questions, Santa Claus, Train, US Geography

But I Still Don't Understand Those Two Dangly Bits

Girl, on sex-ed: Well, I went to a Catholic school and as a result I didn't know what a penis was until I got to high school.
Guy: I think these middle school girls need psychotherapy before they need birth control. 11-year-olds shouldn't be having sex.
Girl: Girls? Why just the girls? They're having sex with 11-year-old boys. You need something to stick in there in order to get pregnant.
Professor: Well, it looks like you found out what a penis was.

University of Northern Iowa
Cedar Falls, Iowa

Posted on April 27, 2009
Christianity, Colleges & Universities, Default, Education, Girls, Iowa, Kids, Penis, Pregnancy, Questions, Sex, Students, Teachers

Fewer Errors

Girl, watching baseball: Ugh, I'd rather have anal than watch baseball!

Waterloo
Ontario
Canadia

Overheard by: me too.

Posted on April 27, 2009
Ass, Backdoor, Canadia, Compare and contrast, Default, Girls

We're All One Drunken Car Crash Away from Crutches, Honey

Girl: It's hard to listen to his lectures, but he has crutches so he's fun to look at.

UC
Santa Cruz, California

Posted on April 27, 2009
California, Colleges & Universities, Compare and contrast, Default, Girls, Sensory experiences, Weirdness

So He's More Of a Business Associate Than a Friend

Climbing instructor to terrified new climber being held by another: Is he or is he not your friend? Would a friend drop you?
Terrified new climber: Well, he's my husband, so I don't know!

Climbing Gym
New York City, New York

Posted on April 26, 2009
Compare and contrast, Default, Employees, New York, Questions, Relationships

If It'll Be Reflected in Our Grades

Professor: Please don't talk amongst yourselves. When you talk amongst yourselves, I imagine you're saying horrible things like “Who would ever want to shag him?”
Previously chatting student: Don't worry! We all want to shag you!

University of Glasgow
Scotland
UK

Posted on April 26, 2009
Colleges & Universities, Default, Offers and requests, Questions, Sex, Students, Teachers, UK

What? Two Bugs Are Having a Race.

Very large man, staring down at his junk in front of urinal: Come on now, baby, you can do it, come on…

Houston, Texas

Overheard by: Dan

Posted on April 25, 2009
Default, Euphemisms, Guys, Offers and requests, Restroom, Texas, Weirdness

Like Babies Do

Writer: That guy is so small he could get a job as a stunt midget.
Illustrator: Is that a real profession? I would have thought they did their own stunts.

Greenville Airport
Texas

Overheard by: Mike

Posted on April 25, 2009
Airports & flights, Compare and contrast, Default, Employees, Jobs & Careers, Questions, Texas

Last Time, the Gods Were Not Happy When We Sacrificed a Slut

Ditzy girl: I was so scared! Like, really, really scared. I was like: “please be a virgin, please be a virgin!”

Eugene, Oregon

Posted on April 25, 2009
Default, Feelings, Girls, Offers and requests, Oregon, Virginity

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