Female employee, seeing lunch being prepared: Oh, Kielbasa! I love Kielbasa! You know how I like my Kielbasa?
(pause)
Fireman #1: On your knees?
Fireman #2: In your mouth?
Maine
Girl: I hate being single.
Friend: You're not single, you're just alone.
Eastern Arizona College
Overheard by: Lura
Loud woman on cell: If you're looking for a place to make friends and be sociable, you can do a lot better than AA.
Supermarket
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: the cashier
Hot girl to less than hot guy: It gets annoying having guys hitting on you all the time.
Seattle, Washington
Girl student: So, the Federal Government is like, a puppy, like (giggle) they're so cute… And like, you want to just cuddle them, then they're naughty and it's bad.
Teacher: Kelly, could you please explain a bit more? I'm not getting your reasoning here.
Girl student: Well…they do good things, and it's cute, then they like pee on your rug, and it's bad.
Teacher: I promise you, the next time a member of the Federal Government pees on my rug, I will go bonkers.
Boulder, Colorado
Overheard by: Tizri
Student: I agree with everything Bill O'Reilly says.
University of Toronto
Canadia
Young daughter to white mother: You fell in love with a Mexican?
White mom: Yes, I did.
Mexican dad: Unfortunately.
El Fenix
Texas
Nervous fourth grader giving oral report: Joan of Arc, the pheasant, was caught in a blender.
Elementary School
Duluth, Minnesota
Overheard by: Nic
Girl #1: So how is your new class going?
Girl #2: I don't know yet. We just found out there's a presentation that's worth 20%.
Girl #1: That sucks.
Girl #2: Yeah, and like, it's not easy either, like we have to think!
Ryerson University
Toronto, Ontario
Canadia
Overheard by: Lookforthewoman
Seven-year-old-daughter: I'm sorry, daddy, but I love crafts!
Father: I know…can't you find another hobby?
Seven-year-old-daughter: No, daddy, it's going to be just like at camp!
Father: Yeah, your mother and I should have switched you at the hospital.
Michael's
Hamilton, New Jersey
Overheard by: Diana
