Girl in stall (yelling on cell): Oh, my god. Do you really have herpes? That's contagious, right? Should I get tested?
(flush of toilet)
Friend's voice on speakerphone: Am I on speakerphone in the bathroom?
Girl in stall: Yeah, I'm just peeing. So should I get tested?
Friend: I'm not talking about this on speakerphone.
Girl in stall: Okay, it's off… Oh, so you can only get herpes through sex?
Public Bathroom
Kent State University, Ohio
Overheard by: Laureen
Middle-aged woman to friend, exiting Forever 21: Well, that was a foray into a subculture we're not familiar with.
Kenwood Mall
Cincinnati, Ohio
Overheard by: Lisa
Emo girl to emo friend: They have a whole Harry Potter section…I love the world!
Borders
Manalapan, New Jersey
Girl suit (walking by a fancy art studio pointing at the concrete): Oh my god! That's totally where Ashley peed on Saturday night!
Friend: We didn't even walk down this street!
Girl suit: Yes we did! Because that's the trash can you were passed out over, this is the corner where I ditched you.
7th & J
San Diego, California
Black girl to girlfriend: He's young, like 24, 25. And get this: I was like, “So, what else do you do?” and he goes “I make beats.” I said, “Of course you do.”
Subway
New York City, New York
Overheard by: EL
Freakishly tall chick: Could you imagine a primordial dwarf in my family? The kid would kill me as soon as they could wield a weapon of some kind, because I'd laugh at them so much.
Friend: Or he'd turn the hatred outwards, and be a serial killer. Oh man, could you imagine, a primordial dwarf serial killer?
Freakishly tall chick: That would be awesome.
Aurora, Colorado
Overheard by: Lee
Girl #1: He's kind of ugly.
Girl #2: He kind of reminds me of a marionette because his cheeks are shiny and puffed up all the time.
Black Market Vintage Clothing
Toronto, Ontario
Canadia
Overheard by: kj
Dude #1: So yeah, Kayla* got me kicked off the ski trip because I gave her ten bucks to buy some food. And she bought scissors. Fucking scissors. And apparently I'm not stable enough to have scissors and they think I'll fucking stab someone with them. And she gave me back $2.48 in change. The scissors were from the fucking dollar store. They couldn't have been that expensive. Next time she sits on my lap in math class I'm gonna call her a pick-pocket.
Dude #2: Okay, great story. Now shut the fuck up. I missed half the fucking dialogue of Cloverfield.
West Edmonton Mall
Edmonton, Alberta
Canadia
Overheard by: Trying to watch Cloverfield
