Girls

Distressed girl in dining hall: Her questions go in a circle, then down to the corner and back. Except the teacher thinks they come all the way back but no, they don't. I'm still down at the corner thinking to myself, “Where the fuck am I?!”

Cornell College, Iowa

Ditz #1: …and then I was like, “Why did I fail spring semester, sir?” and then he was like, “You asked me if The Odyssey was an actual event, and stated that it was in every one of your papers on the subject, even after I told you it wasn't.”
Ditz #2: Wait, it wasn't?

Loyola University
Chicago, Illinois

Creepster in poncho: I like your hair.
Hot chick: Oh, thanks.
Creepster in poncho: It smells like my grandma.

Bus stop
Gainesville, Florida

Customer: Excuse me, where is your non-fiction section?
Salesgirl: What type of non-fiction are you looking for?
Customer: Harry Potter.

Bookstore
Milwaukee, Wisconsin

Girl: Yeah, but he has a really nice penis. I like to play with it while we watch movies.

overheardattcnj.blogspot.com

Overheard by: Overheard at TCNJ

Girl #1: Jane*'s nice.
Girl #2: Yeah. But she smells like a dirty used tampon.
Girl #1: Yeah, makes me sick a bit.

University of Toronto
Canadia

High school girl in hot tub #1: Ugh, my bikini won't stop falling down!
High school girl in hot tub #2: You do look a little… undersupported. Do you wanna trade tops?
High school girl in hot tub #1: Really?
High school girl in hot tub #2: Yeah, it's not like I need the support.
High school girl in hot tub #1: True.
(high school boys in hot tub stare intently)

Westchester, New York

Overheard by: Jenny Suburbs

Guy: Did you see his hickie? It's huge!
Girl: He has a hickie? But I thought he was gay!

Avenue of the Stars
Century City, California

Girl #1: So, did you MapQuest it?
Girl #2: No, we gas-stationed it!

Tyler, Texas

Overheard by: emi

That's No Euphemism, Dear Reader

Girl on cell: I would've loved to have gone to that socks summit. It sounds amazing!

Boston, Massachusetts

Overheard by: Me, too?