Queer on cell: Stop it. She’s too chicken to be anorexic. It’s like, she’ll starve herself for two days, then eat a huge cookie.
Los Angeles, California
Queer on cell: Stop it. She’s too chicken to be anorexic. It’s like, she’ll starve herself for two days, then eat a huge cookie.
Los Angeles, California
Linda: Ugh, this class is so depressing!
Professor: Let’s all take ten seconds to think about baby lambs to make Linda feel happy. [pause] Okay, back to Terri Schiavo!
Marist College
Poughkeepsie, New York
Coworker, indignantly: Stop locking up my chuzzles!
Bellingham, Washington
Overheard by: Should be working
Angry mother: Don’t do that! [Son screams.] I have friends, you know! You think I would rather be with you than with them?! I have a life!
Bethesda, Maryland
Overheard by: K-lee
20-ish girl: But he still gave me a ticket!
20-ish guy: That sucks.
20-ish girl: The cop said I was criminally fast.
20-ish guy: That sounds hot.
Mirage Secret Garden
Las Vegas, Nevada
Traveling college student to perplexed Cambodian waiter: What? You don’t have French toast? Weren’t you guys colonized by the French or something?
Restaurant
Phom Penh
Cambodia
(two lesbians taking items out of the shopping cart to place in their truck)
Butch lesbian (picking up a heavy box): Why do I always have to carry the heavy things just because I wear the dildo?
Wal-Mart
Dublin, Ohio
Overheard by: Octopus seeks sucker fish for good times and long walks
Girl on cell: No way. I’m not moving to North Carolina. That state totally sucks. Seriously… There is not one damned thing about that state that I like, except for the hot men that live on base. And you know what else? I love this store, but I have no idea what anything is because it’s all in a foreign language.
IKEA
Canton, Michigan
Black guy to white girl: I hate black people!
White girl: You hate yourself?
Black guy: No. I just hate black people. They're always late. And they tell me to wear my pants down. I made friends with a white supremacist.
White girl: But they hate you!
Black guy: He liked me…
Norman, Oklahoma
Chick #1: Well, Michelle got pissed because he touched her boob.
Chick #2: Normally I’d take her side, but Michelle is just so… gropable!
Queen’s University at Kingston
Ontario
Canadia
Overheard by: I’ll never teee-eeell!
