Small child #1: Hey, daddy, can we go get some ice cream?!
Small child #2: Yeah, daddy, let's have ice cream!
Father: Uh, no. But you can have yogurt drinks. They're basically the same!
Small children: Yay!
West Edmonton Mall
Canadia
Overheard by: Dr. Ruth
Guy on cell: I know of at least two plant and four fish species that could do my job just as well… Now, the fish just came in with touchscreen technology.
Covington, Kentucky
Overheard by: Jesus Freak
Man #1: How’s your wife?
Man #2: How should I know?
Man #1: What do you mean: “How should I know?”? She’s your wife! Don’t you talk to her?
Man #2: Not since she got the restraining order on me.
Huxley, Iowa
Overheard by: Hondo
Little boy: You used to have a pocket knife, mommy!
Mother, laughing nervously: No, I didn’t!
Little boy: Yes you did! You used to!
Nervous mother: No, I never did! I never had a pocket knife! Please don’t tell the police that!
YMCA
Hollywood, California
Overheard by: Muffin
Guy: You’re allowed to wipe boogers on my girlfriend and fart in her face, but I can’t hit your girlfriend?! That is so hypocritical!
Driver’s Ed class
Long Island, New York
Overheard by: Chrissy
Brother: Where's the baby?
Sister: Over there. (gestures to crazy 4-5 year old child in jungle gym)
Brother: I'm sorry, but every time my nephew goes insane I want to clothesline him.
Sister: I don't think you're quite ready for fatherhood yet.
Playground
Poway, California
Overheard by: Jail, Anyone?
Man with strange beard to friend: My girlfriend would love me forever if I got her a fox's skull.
London
England
Guy: So, what do you do?
Woman: Well, I’m actually a homemaker.
Guy: … Oh! So you’re, like, in construction? That’s cool.
http://www.overheardinminneapolis.com/2007/07/well_the_hours_are_probably_si.html
Overheard by: DRB
Dude #1: He’s real churchy, but emo, too.
Dude #2: Yeah, totally ‘What-Would-Jesus-Cut?’
Sikeston, Missouri
Middle school boy: They could solve world hunger if they just kept cloning lots of sheep.
Friend: Aren't sheep like, tofu?
Radnor, Pennsylvania
