Guy, aggressively: I’ll sparkle you!
The Eiffel Tower
Paris
France
Overheard by: Emily
Guy, aggressively: I’ll sparkle you!
The Eiffel Tower
Paris
France
Overheard by: Emily
Guy to another: Running naked with a sword is just not a good idea.
Guelph
Canadia
Fratboy wannabe #1, entering coffee shop, to friend: Dude, I was just attacked by Wes.
Fratboy wannabe #2: Who's Wes? Do I know Wes?
Fratboy wannabe #1: Yeah, yeah. Big guy, lives in our dorm.
Fratboy wannabe #2: The one I gave a hug to last night?
Fratboy wannabe #1: I don't know. I can't keep up.
Golden Roast
Knoxville, Tennessee
Overheard by: Creeped-out Cara
Man walking down street: Dude… your woman just said “we need to talk.” You need to get the fuck out of there right now!
San Francisco, California
Six-year-old boy to uncle about to leave for a trip: Bring me a woman!
Simi Valley, California
Hotel guest exiting meeting: You know, in a case like this I would typically use the phrase, ‘I wouldn’t trust it as far as I could throw it,’ but I could throw that chicken pretty far.
The Phoenician Resort
Scottsdale, Arizona
Overheard by: Accurate…
Girl: She has vagina legs.
Guy friend: How does she have vagina legs?
Texas Christian University
Fort Worth, Texas
Excited hipster guy on cell: Dude, you just missed Wyclef Jean! He was fucking awesome! He dry-humped me and everything!
Voodoo Music Fest
New Orleans, Louisiana
Overheard by: Eliza
