Guys

Girl, to two guys smoking in a bar: Oh my gosh! Smoking? Gross! (walks away, disgusted)
Guy #1: You wanna follow her and smoke?
Guy #2: Hell yeah, I do.

Denver, Colorado

Dude on cell: Hey, all I know is lonely men love chicken…

Illinois Wesleyan University
Illinois

Overheard by: martha

Teen guy: Yeah, we got like, so wasted!
Teen girl #1: It was great, yeah. We got so high.
Teen girl #2: Where did you guys get the alcohol?
Teen girl #1: What?
Teen girl #2: If you guys were getting high, where did you get the alcohol?
Teen girl #1: That's drunk. You get high off weed.
Teen girl #2: Oh. Okay. Then, where'd you get that?
Teen guy: My sister. She's sixteen!
Teen girl #2: Can't you get high off books?
Teen guy: What?
Teen girl #2: Cause, can't, like…books get you high?
Teen girl #1: What?

Library
East Vancouver, BC
Canadia

Guy: We could have been run over by trucks or seagulls.

Marist College
Poughkeepsie, New York

Overheard by: Nik

Guy: It was mostly about fucking goats, but I also learned a lot about libel law.

Miami, Florida

Overheard by: Nick

Man gassing up his pickup truck to screaming woman inside: Goddammit, Delores, I cannot unfuck that woman!

Gas Station, Alabama

Man to another in restroom stall: Let go of my ears; I know what I’m doing!

Nightclub, Oxford Street
Darlinghurst, Sydney
Australia

Overheard by: Claudia Rose

Guy #1: Hey, cool! Harry Potter bookmarks! You think they have one for Hufflepuff?
Guy #2: Probably not.
Guy #1: Oh… Do you think it’s because nobody cares?

Borders
Tucson, Arizona

Dude #1: Hey, man, you okay?
Dude #2: Yeah, I was just in that… hot… shit… What’s that called?
Dude #1: The sauna?
Dude #2: Yeah. That shit is hot, man.

Rec center
Gilbert, Arizona

Male student to girlfriend: Your body is uneven!

George Mason University
Fairfax County, Virginia