Four-year-old kid: Everything I touch dies.
Rest Stop
Connecticut
Four-year-old kid: Everything I touch dies.
Rest Stop
Connecticut
Girl #1: Oh my god! Look at the little toddler snowsuits!
Girl #2: Will one of you please get knocked up?
Amherst, Massachusetts
Four-year-old: I'm not here to make friends!
Disney's Animal Kingdom
Orlando, Florida
Older sister: Did you know Louie Armstrong smoked a lot of pot?
Younger sister: While he was in space?
Auburn, Washington
Four-year-old boy, wielding plastic sword and shield: It's a knife!
Boy's mother: No, it's a sword.
Four-year-old boy: No! It's a knife!
Boy's mother: No, no, no, Danny. Knives are for cutting. Swords are for vanquishing.
99 B-Line
Vancouver
Canadia
Overheard by: Frodo Baggins
Female college student: Do boys still really have cooties at thirteen?
Male college student: Nope. That’s when they get penises.
Tempe, Arizona
Overheard by: Meghan
Little boy to tour bus driver: Thank you.
Bus driver: Now that's a sign of good parenting.
Parent, as he steps off bus: Yeah. We're takin' him on a whiskey tour.
Jack Daniels Distillery
Lynchburg, Tennessee
Goateed gentleman: I tried to teach her that certain words for things were different, like that toothpaste was actually “poop,” but I think I waited until she was a bit too old.
Mars Volta Concert, Rams Head Live
Baltimore, Maryland
Overheard by: Greeg
Small boy: They used to shove a big bar of soap right down your throat! But that’s illegal now.
Small girl: Like, if you say ‘poop,’ or if you say ‘hell‘?
Small boy, thinking deeply: I’ve got to research it.
Third grade classroom
Newton, Massachusetts
Professor: I have kids. I might have grandkids, but with my children… that probably shouldn't happen.
Arcadia University
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
