Kids

Little boy (pointing to a plastic butterfly): Mommy, what's that?
Mom: That's a butterfly. Do you like butterflies?
Little boy (timidly): No…
Mom: Why not?
Little boy: They hurt me.

The Mall
Victoria
Canadia

Mother to four-year-old in doctor's waiting room: Come on, Sam*, we're next.
Sam: Are we seeing the doctor?
Mother: Yup.
Sam: (pause) Well, okay. As long as he doesn't look at my penis.

Hurstbridge Medical Center
Hurstbridge
Australia

Annoying daughter: Ewww, don't order broccoli pizza. That's gross!
White trash mom: Smell my armpit.
Annoying daughter: Okay!
White trash mom: Here, smell this one too.

Roma Pizza
Ocean City, New Jersey

Overheard by: grossed out

(kids looking at strawberry flavored condoms)
Kid #1: Strawberries!
Kid #2: No, they're strawberry balloons.
Kid #3 (shocked): No, they're condoms!
All 3 kids: Arrghhh.

Supermarket
Melbourne
Australia

Two-year-old boy: I'm too sexy for my shirt, too sexy for my shirt! So sexy!
Eight-year-old brother: He doesn't know what it means, he just does it for attention.

Canadia

Overheard by: Amused Babysitter

Two-year-old girl: Mommy! You have hair on your vagina!

Restroom
Washington, DC

Energetic little boy: Can I punch him?
Harassed mom: You can punch him later.

Lake Arrowhead, California

Mom standing outside of bathroom stall: Honey, hurry up, there is a line waiting.
Four-year-old girl: I can’t, my body requires me to go slow.

Capitol Building Bathroom
Washington, DC

Guy: So, you can talk about stabbing puppies but I can’t talk about punting babies? That doesn’t seem right.
Girl: That’s exactly right.

Rutgers Stadium, New Jersey

Suit to other: Then he kept trying to sell me this little boy for a dollar…

Taco Bell
Colorado Springs, Colorado

Overheard by: Brandon