Fat lady pulling her kid from path of speeding bus: That’s right — step out and meet Jesus!
Columbia, South Carolina
Overheard by: Cootine
Fat lady pulling her kid from path of speeding bus: That’s right — step out and meet Jesus!
Columbia, South Carolina
Overheard by: Cootine
Little boy: Mommy, whats a M.I.L.F.?
Mom: Well, honey, it’s a… Wait, someone called me a M.I.L.F.?
Little boy: No, Bobby’s mom.
Mom: Well, then, it’s not important. Go play.
Barnes & Noble
Indianapolis, Indiana
Overheard by: i’d like to see bobby’s mom next PTA meeting
Young pregnant mother, gratefully accepting seat on crowded tram: Come over here and sit with mummy, Adam.
Four-year-old: Noooooooooo.
Mother: C'mon, Adam, come sit with mummy.
Four-year-old: Noooooooo (but slinks over and sits down anyway)
Mother: Better?
Four-year-old: You've ruined my life, mom.
Mother: Yes, honey, I know.
Melbourne
Australia
Overheard by: Soap Oprah
Mother: And some armies have the sniper and he just picks them all off. Pkk pkk pkk.
Three-year-old with chicken pox (over still talking mother): I'm Spartacus!
Five-year-old without chicken pox: No, I'm Spartacus, you're Spartacus!
Mother, still talking: And then the detonator gets attached and once the fuse goes, it all goes boom!
Three-year-old: I'm Spartacus!
Five-year-old: You're Spartacus!
Flight between London and Liverpool
England
Overheard by: nadine
Ten-year-old girl to passing adult man: What's your name?
Mother, scolding: Do you have to hit on every man you see?
Disneyland
Anaheim, California
13-year-old boy to parents: Shit, this place smells like old people and debauchery.
Mom: Now let's not judge the whores, Tommy.
Sahara Casino
Las Vegas, Nevada
Overheard by: djglucose
Seven-year-old boy: How did Michael Jackson die?
Mother: He had too many tablets and his heart stopped.
Seven-year-old boy: I'd like that to happen to Justin Bieber.
Hertfordshire
England
Overheard by: Corbin
Little boy: Mommy, what’s a condom?
Mom: It’s short for ‘condominium,’ honey.
Little boy: Oh… Mommy, did you ever live in a condom?
Ft. Lauderdale, Florida
Woman, paying for breakfast: I had to beat up my son for this five dollars.
Deli Counter
Bethesda, Maryland
Overheard by: Minivet
