Guy #1, standing in front of classroom: So he walked up to me and was like, “Dude, do you want a donut?” and of course I was like, “yeah.”
Guy #2: Well, yeah. I love donuts too.
Guy #1: So then he whips out this trash bag and it's filled to the top with donuts. So I took this one off the top and started eating it, and then I realized, dude! Where the hell did you get a trash bag full of donuts?
Guy #2: Woah. Where'd he go?!
Hanover, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: Emmeline
(little girl follows older sister into the bathroom)
Older sister: Sarah, do not come in here with me! I'm on the phone!
Sarah: But I have to go to the bathroom! Besides, you're just talking to your boyfriend.
Older sister: Sarah, I mean it! Go up to the room.
Sarah: You know daddy doesn't let me go in the elevator by myself.
Older sister: Just do it, he's not going to know.
Sarah: But someone could take me!
Older sister: Yeah right, who would want you?
Sarah: The Vice President of the United States!
Marriot Hotel
Teaneck, New Jersey
Man in mall: Excuse me, where can I hail a taxi?
Mall employee: This is Vermont, dude.
Man in mall: There has to be taxis. There are roads, aren't they?
Mall employee: Nope, no taxis. But lots of guns.
Rutland, Vermont
Overheard by: MeggerzDotCom
Man on street (asking for donations to a charity): You wanna donate?
Man #1: What about all the money I pay in taxes? That's a donation.
Man #2: Oh shit, I don't even know what to say to that.
16th & Chestnut
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: indigo
Girl on subway: Hey, can we talk for a minute?
Guy sitting next to her: What are you, some kind of psycho?
http://community.livejournal.com/overheardatbu/65550.html
Overheard by: Ian
Southern stewardess: In case of a water landing occurring in between Tucson and Las Vegas… (pause) If you are traveling with a spouse or ex-wife be sure to put on your own oxygen mask first so that you have an excuse to leave them on their own.
(later)
Southern stewardess: There are six bathrooms on this Boeing 747, feel free to use any of them if you don't like my jokes. (pause) Oh, and if you have any questions don't ask me, I'm new here.
Flight 280
Tucson, Arizona
Overheard by: kat
Seven-year-old boy to small sister at counter: Get out of the line! You on the line and I'm exquisite. I'm exquisite! I'm exquisite! I'm exquisite!
H&M
Washington, DC
Professor: Man, I'm sick of this lecture. Let's just leave.
Johnson and Wales University
Providence, Rhode Island
Overheard by: Misaki
Professor: Will someone please close the door? I don't want anyone else to hear the stupid things I say. Oh, wait, I have tenure now–I don't care if they hear me saying stupid things!
Georgia State University
Annoying daughter: Ewww, don't order broccoli pizza. That's gross!
White trash mom: Smell my armpit.
Annoying daughter: Okay!
White trash mom: Here, smell this one too.
Roma Pizza
Ocean City, New Jersey
Overheard by: grossed out
