…I've Been Saving That Up All Semester.

Elderly Bible as Literature professor: People often say things that catch people off guard. Like if I said even Jesus shat.
(entire class goes completely silent)
Professor: Holy shit, huh?

College
Massachusetts

Posted on February 26, 2020
Colleges & Universities, Compare and contrast, Default, Jesus, Massachusetts, Poop, Questions, Religious fanatics, Teachers

The Magic Night Cletus Met Brandine

Male redneck: You can come over, but you can't be shittin' in my bathroom.
(female redneck is silent)
Male redneck: Seriously… I like you and all, but I don't know you good enough for you to be stankin' up my bathroom.
(they leave together)

Project Lounge
Biloxi, Mississippi

Overheard by: these are the people who get to have sex?

Posted on February 8, 2020
Mississippi, Poop, Rednecks, Relationships

Fine, Call It “Guano” If That Makes You Feel Better

Man to son: Stop talking about vampire bats and focus on your poop.

San Diego, California

Posted on February 2, 2020
Advice, Animals, California, Dads, Default, Family ties, Poop

Winston Churchill Pushes the Allies to Invade Sicily

Guy on cell: I believe in signs, dude. I took a dump and it was totally shaped like a boot. I'm going to Italy.

http://overheardlines.blogspot.com/2008/07/guy-discussing-his-vacation-plans.html

Overheard by: alicia

Posted on December 25, 2019
Default, Guys, On the phone, Overheard Lines, Poop, Weirdness

I’m Still Tasting Yesterday’s

Crazy bag lady: Can I have that shirt? I’m all dirty and nasty.
Young guy: No, I need this for work.
Crazy bag lady: Oh. Can I shit in your mouth?
Young guy: Um, no.

Washington, DC

Posted on October 9, 2019
Bag ladies, Clothing, Poop, Washington, DC

Well, I Guess It Depends What He'd Eaten That Day

Female diner #1: I mean, he was awesome. He had a lifeguard body. If he shit, I would eat it.
Female diner #2: (pushes food away)

O'Callaghan's
Chicago, Illinois

Posted on August 25, 2019
Food, Illinois, Poop, Weirdness, Women

Cats Are Hypersensitive to Comma Faults

Boy: So why did you move here?
Girl: I was gonna go to art school and then I wrote this big essay and my cat shit on it.
Boy: Literally shit on it?
Girl: Yeah, I took it as a sign.

18 Bus
Seattle, Washington

Posted on April 18, 2019
Animals, Bus, Default, Education, Feelings, Friends, Girls, Guys, Poop, Questions, Washington

I Guess If You Want to Be Anal About It…

Teen girl with group of friends: But I don’t get it… Why would you wipe it *that* way particularly?
(long silence, group of friends look at each other)
Friend, incredulously: Uhh… So you don’t get shit in your vag?

Federation Square
Melbourne
Australia

Posted on December 27, 2018
Australia, Default, Girls, Health & Hygiene, Poop, Questions, Teens, Weirdness

Like a Scat Burglar?

Boy: Dad, why do toilets flush?
Dad, irritated: I don’t know.
Boy: I think it is so no one can steal the poop.

Bathroom
Phoenix, Arizona

Overheard by: Pooper Snooper

Posted on September 23, 2018
Arizona, Comebacks, Dads, Kids, Poop, Questions

Piss Christ Comes to Dallas

Man #1: Hey, are those bathrooms?
Man #2: No…that's art.

Discovery Green Park
Houston, Texas

Posted on May 4, 2018
Compare and contrast, Guys, Pee, Poop, Questions, Texas