Nobody Can Do Sexual Harassment Like the Insane

Crazy bag lady, loudly: I don't suck dick for pussy! I don't suck dick for pussy! I don't suck dick for pussy!
(sits down next to another passenger on the subway)
Crazy bag lady, now in passenger's face: I don't suck dick for pussy!
(female passenger gets up and moves)
Crazy bag lady: Why you jumping? Why you jumping, bitch!? You weren't jumpin' last night when that guy put his long ass dick in you last night!
Female passenger: Excuse me, ma'am, don't say that to me! You don't know me!
(subway train stops)
Conductor: City Hall station!
Female passenger: Excuse me, sir, there's a crazy lady on the subway harassing the other passengers.
Conductor: Oh, could you point her out to me?
(female passenger points to crazy woman yelling)
Conductor: Ma'am, are you bothering people?
Crazy bag lady: Why you tryin' to fuck me standing up!? Why don't you fuck me lying down like a gentleman!
Conductor: Ma'am, I'm calling the police.

Broad Street Line Subway
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania

Posted on April 7, 2021
Ass, BJs, Compare and contrast, Crazies, Default, Employees, Insults, Offers and requests, Penis, Pennsylvania, Public transportation, Questions, Sex, Vagina, Weirdness, Women

Ah, the Irish Imagination

Little boy, as plane starts its descent: Oh my god! What are going to do? We are going to get stuck in the clouds! Please! Somebody help us! Help!

Dublin
Ireland

Posted on March 13, 2021
Airports & flights, Default, Guys, Ireland, Kids, Offers and requests, Public transportation, Questions

But Here's a Coupon for a Complimentary Cavity Search

Irate mother: No, you don't understand. I need to board that plane now!
Stewardess at gate: Ma'm, you cannot board now. There is no airplane at the end of the jetway. Look–no plane out there.

http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/overheardinminneapolis/~3/473032304/i-bet-a-lot-of-people-dont-understand-that-woman.html

Overheard by: delayed flights always make me irrational too

Posted on December 15, 2020
Compare and contrast, Default, Employees, Moms, Offers and requests, Overheard in Minneapolis, Public transportation, Women

But I'm Sure You'll Locate Your Suitcase– Bwahaha!

Passenger trying to find lost baggage: Excuse me! Do you work for United?
Airline steward: No! Oh no! Thank god!

P.E. Trudeau Airport
Montreal
Canadia

Posted on October 30, 2020
Airports & flights, Canadia, Clients, Flight attendants, Jobs & Careers, Public transportation, Questions

We'd Hate to Hear Him in Bed

Pilot over intercom after rough landing: Whooaa, Nessie! (makes galloping sound) Easy, girl! (makes baaing sound) Whoops, wrong animal.

Houston, Texas

Overheard by: kayla

Posted on October 19, 2020
Airports & flights, Animals, Default, Pilots, Public transportation, Texas, Weirdness

Just When Race Relations Were Improving in Boston

White tourist: I’m really sorry — I don’t have any change. If I did, I’d give you some, but I don’t, so… sorry. Good luck with everything…
Black dude: Cracka, I’m ain’t homeless!

Hynes Convention Center subway stop
Boston, Massachusetts

Posted on October 15, 2020
Black people, Comebacks, Default, Feelings, Massachusetts, Public transportation, Tourists, Whiteys

Translation: “Welcome to New York, Muthafuckaaaas.”

MTA worker to tourist mom buying tickets with daughter: 10 dollars.
Mom: Oh, but she's a student.
Worker, looking at daughter: Oh! How nice for you! (looks back at mom) Ten dollars please.

Subway Station
New York City, New York

Overheard by: Glad thats not my cheap-ass mom

Posted on July 3, 2020
Compliments, Default, Education, Employees, Moms, Money, New York, Offers and requests, Public transportation, Tourists, Women

Everyone Feels Like This When They See Tom Cruise

Girl #1: Shit!
Girl #2: What?
Girl #1: I forgot to ask him if he's gay!
Girl #2: But you don't even know him!
Girl #1: I know, and now I've lost my chance…I'll wonder for the rest of my life if he was gay or not. And maybe one day, when I'm old and gray, I'll see him, at a bus-stop maybe, and then I'll try to ask him…and he'll be already on the bus, and I'll never know.
Girl #2: You're kind of a freak.

University of Delaware

Posted on June 19, 2020
Colleges & Universities, Default, Delaware, Girls, Public transportation, Questions, Sexuality, Weirdness

Requiem for a Dream? Really?

Passenger to attendant: Excuse me? They turned the movie off.
Attendant: Yes, we're landing earlier than thought.
Passenger: Oh, but the movie wasn't over.
Attendant: Sorry about that, but we need to turn it off for descent.
Passenger: But I was watching it!
Attendant: I am very sorry, but since we have started our descent…
Passenger, interrupting: But now I don't know how it ends!
Attendant: They all lived happily ever after.

Qantas Flight to Melbourne
Australia

Overheard by: Seat 14 F

Posted on March 13, 2020
Airports & flights, Australia, Clients, Flight attendants, Gripes, Happiness, Movies, Public transportation, Stupidity

When Rappers Moonlight.

Train driver: This train is being taken out of service. Brigham Circle will be the last stop for this train. Don't hate the player, hate the game!

E Train
Boston, Massachusetts

Overheard by: camille

Posted on February 5, 2020
Advice, Conductors, Gripes, Massachusetts, Public transportation, Train

Public transportation