What Do You Think Scrapple Is?

Slutty girl: Hey, you know cow titties?
Quiet girl: Uhhh…
Slutty girl: Can you eat them?
Quiet girl: What?
Slutty girl: You know — cow titties!
Quiet girl: You mean udders?
Slutty girl: Yeah! Can you eat them?

French class, All Saints High School
Whitby, Ontario
Canadia

Overheard by: freshman whisperer

Posted on September 24, 2019
Bimbettes, Canadia, Questions

Like a University Professor Ever Has to Pay for It

Statistics professor: So let's say we ask a random question, such as “have you had unprotected sex with a prostitute in the last week?”.
(class laughs)
Statistics professor: Most people would answer “no.” Including myself. I'll leave it up to you to decide if that's the truth or not.

University of Guelph
Ontario
Canadia

Overheard by: Danielle

Posted on September 18, 2019
Canadia, Class, Colleges & Universities, Default, Lies, Questions, Sex, Teachers

Can I Get a High Five? Anybody? Anybody?

Man with sons and wife: We made good time. Only took an hour.
Wife, getting angry: Would you stop letting people know how ignorant you really are?
Man: So what? We did the Louvre in 45 minutes.

Reina Sofia Museum
Madrid
Spain

Overheard by: amy abes

Posted on September 11, 2019
Comebacks, Family, Family ties, Insults, Questions, Spain, Stupidity, Time Management

For a Second I Thought You Were Talking About Our Key-Parties

Five-year-old girl: Hey, mom, you know how you hate “pop and switch?”
Mom: Uh…what's “pop and switch?”
Five-year-old girl: The one where they trade bodies.
Mom: Oh! Oh, yeah, I hate “pop and switch.” That's scary…

JCPenney, Florence Mall
Florence, Kentucky

Overheard by: Dohiyi

Posted on September 7, 2019
Default, Feelings, Girls, Kentucky, Kids, Malls, Moms, Questions, Words

Don't Bite the Hand That Grades You

Annoying professor, about optical illusion on slide: What do you all see here?
Student: A moron with tenure.

Carleton University
Ottawa
Canadia

Posted on September 6, 2019
Canadia, Class, Education, Insults, Questions, Science, Students, Teachers

Presenting, FEMA’s Original Clean-Up Plan

Four-year-old girl in bathroom stall: That’s the biggest roll of toilet paper I’ve ever seen. What’s the deal with that?

Wal-Mart, Tchoupitoulas Street
New Orleans, Louisiana

Overheard by: Tory

Posted on September 4, 2019
Kids, Louisiana, Questions

Dear World– We Apologize.

American tourist #1: What's your background?
Tourist guide: Aboriginal.
American tourist #1: No, as in “where were you born?”
Tourist guide: Here, in Australia.
American tourist #1: But you're black!
Tourist guide: Yes… I'm aboriginal.
American tourist #1: But I thought you guys were all extinct! Are you, like, the last one?
American tourist #2: Jay, shut up. It's idiots like you that make us look stupid. He's messing with you, there are no aboriginals.

Adelaide, Australia