Little boy: Ewww… what's that smell?
Slightly tipsy dad: Prolly barf.
Little boy: Yuck! You're gross!
Slightly tipsy dad: What? It's a twins game. People come to get drunk, then they barf, and you smell it. That's how it goes.
http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/overheardinminneapolis/~3/270078695/so-come-on-down-to-the-metrodome.html
Overheard by: that's not why I go to twins games.
Girl: So if you won £100,000,000 on the lottery what would you do?
Guy: Settle some scores. There'd be a few guys from school who'd be going to work one day and suddenly find themselves being bundled into the back of a van with a black bag over their head.
Girl: Then flown out over the north Atlantic, tied up, thrown out of the plane?
Guy: I like the way you think. We should have kids.
Girl: Nah, to get into my pants you'll need to do better than that. £2,000 of jewelery would do it. (cackles hysterically)
London
England
Overheard by: Bleep
Middle-aged black woman to husband: Baby, you remember that time I shot you?
CVS
Indianapolis, Indiana
Loud annoying guy, gesturing toward himself: Who has two thumbs and is ready to go? This guy!
Saratoga, New York
Overheard by: Ready to Go
Man: What does it say in the bible about punching your son in the face?
Starbucks
Durham, North Carolina
Overheard by: wondering the same thing myself
Young guy on cell: You got a bikini wax?… Really?… How come you never did that when we were together?… Oh, so you’re a woman now?
7-Eleven
Edmonton, Alberta
Canadia
Girl #1: So I didn't go to your brother's house last night.
Guy: Oh, where'd you go?
Girl #1: I was in a car.
Guy: Oh.
Girl #1: Yeah, and they were all like, “Yeah! Whassup?”
Girl #2: I was in a car last night.
College of Charleston
Charleston, South Carolina
Overheard by: Tori
Boy: So why did you move here?
Girl: I was gonna go to art school and then I wrote this big essay and my cat shit on it.
Boy: Literally shit on it?
Girl: Yeah, I took it as a sign.
18 Bus
Seattle, Washington
