Yet You Won't Swallow Your Husband's Semen?

Middle-aged woman with dog: Oh, she peed on my foot. That's your pee. That's your love juice. Did you put your love juice on me? You gave me your love juice.
Woman's friend: It's on your shirt now.
Middle-aged woman: Oh, she pissed on my shirt? It's okay, it's just love juice. Come here, stinks. Come here, stinky. It's just pee. Come, gimme kisses, stink-stink.
Woman's friend: Here, maybe you should let me hold her.
Middle-aged woman, hissing: Get away from my stinky! She gave me her love juice, not you.

Starbucks
San Diego, California

Overheard by: Pips

Posted on August 9, 2019
Animals, Body parts, California, Feelings, Friends, K-I-S-S-I-N-G, Pee, Questions, Stupidity, Women

And Difficult-to-Pronounce Furniture?

Professor, exasperated: Don't you guys know anything about education in Sweden? Or anything about Sweden at all?
Physical education major: Yeah, that's where we get those Swiss Army knives.

Education Class
Ohio State University

Overheard by: i can't believe these people are going to be teachers…

Posted on August 8, 2019
Colleges & Universities, Education, Gadgets, Geography, Ohio, Questions, Stupidity, Teachers

Since Writing Messages in Blood on His Mirror Doesn't Seem to Be Doing the Trick

Girl #1: Oh, whose car do you think it is? Maybe it's his!
Girl #2: Don't hit it!
Girl #1: Or maybe I should. Give us something to talk about. Hey, remember that time I totaled your car?

Saint Joseph's University
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania

Posted on August 6, 2019
Advice, Girls, Pennsylvania, Questions, Weirdness

I Believe the Technical Term Is “Manure”

9-year-old boy, biking: Yo, what kind of flowers are they?
13-year-old brother, also biking: They be poppies an' calla-lilies an' peonies an' oleanders an' hydrangeas an' shit.

Philadelphia, Pennsylvania

Overheard by: Phanatic

Posted on July 25, 2019
Kids, Pennsylvania, Questions, Siblings, Tweens, Words

Really Big Girls, Though

Ditzy blond: How many girls have you seen down there!
Ditzy guy with ditzy blond: Tons! Like, so many! (pause) Oh, okay! Fine! Six.

Great American Ball Park
Cincinnati, Ohio

Posted on July 24, 2019
Leisure, Ohio, Questions, Stupidity, Teens

Speaking Of Things That Need to Stay in Vegas

Guy, telling everyone about a massage: You know how grandma's hands are real soft?

Las Vegas, Nevada

Overheard by: Craig

Posted on July 23, 2019
Family ties, Guys, Hands, Masturbation, Nevada, Questions, Sensory experiences

One Of the More Awkward Responses to “I Love You”

Man to woman: You know what I really love? My hair.

Oberlin, Ohio

Overheard by: jaytro

Posted on July 21, 2019
Default, Feelings, Guys, Hair, Ohio, Questions

Did the Left One Ever Get Over That Cold?

Mid-twenties guy leaving voice mail: Hey baby, just calling to say hi. How are your boobs?

http://eavesdropdc.blogspot.com/2008/06/just-fine-thanks-and-yours.html

Overheard by: brickskeller

Posted on July 21, 2019
Default, Eavesdrop DC, Guys, Nipples, Questions, Relationships, Sexuality

Good Point —No Effect on Religious Beliefs

Professor: Now, if we did eliminate illness and achieved immortality there might be serious religious repercussions. Can anyone think of how this might affect religious beliefs?
Bimbette: Well, like, if Hitler were immortal, he would, like, go to jail for, like, a million years and then, like, chill out for eternity, you know?

Eternal Youth and Immortality Seminar
Lafayette College, Pennsylvania

Overheard by: knows that Hitler would still be dead because he SHOT himself

Posted on July 20, 2019
Bimbettes, Class, Compare and contrast, Crimes, Education, History, Pennsylvania, Philosophy, Questions, Religion, Stupidity, Teachers

Gay Fashion Designers?

Skinny white kid: Who doesn’t love black chicks with fat asses?

Political Theory class, University of Southern California
Los Angeles, California

Posted on July 15, 2019
California, Class, Kids, Questions, Race, Whiteys

Questions