Fat lady pulling her kid from path of speeding bus: That’s right — step out and meet Jesus!
Columbia, South Carolina
Overheard by: Cootine
Fat lady pulling her kid from path of speeding bus: That’s right — step out and meet Jesus!
Columbia, South Carolina
Overheard by: Cootine
Male student #1: I was seriously one letter away from spelling ‘vagina.’
Male student #2: That’s a pretty high-scoring word.
Male student #3: You’d be, like, a Scrabble Club hero or something.
Addelstone Library
Charleston, South Carolina
Overheard by: i was impressed
Drunk redneck: You wanna shoot a shotgun naked? Come to my house!
The Pour House
Charleston, South Carolina
Overheard by: innocent bystander
Woman #1, standing over large dropped box on floor: Ugh, I dropped it.
Woman #2: That's it! Straddle it, you'll get it.
Woman #1: I can never get it up.
Target
North Charleston, South Carolina
Overheard by: Chris M
Loud drunk man at bar to attractive woman leaving restaurant: Can I take you out to McDonald's sometime?
Woman: No, I'm married. Thanks for the offer, though.
Drunk man: Married? Well, shoot! Where's your husband at then?
Woman: He's working.
Drunk man: Working? Well, hell! I work sometimes too!
Applebee's
Beaufort, South Carolina
Southern belle: I basically have two brothers. Well, no, I have three. Basically three brothers.
Charleston, South Carolina
Overheard by: John S.
Teenage boy, shrieking: He touched my penis! He touched my penis! And I'm gay! I'm gay!
Charleston, South Carolina
Girl #1: I smell vagina. Do you smell vagina?
Girl #2: No.
Girl #1: Is it my vagina? Maybe it's your breath. (girl #2 blows in her face) Yeah, it's your breath. It smells like vagina.
Charleston, South Carolina
Host to dumb tourist: Would you like to sit inside or in the garden?
Dumb tourist: What's the weather like in the garden?
Host: I'm going to guess that it's the same as outside the front door you just walked through.
Restaurant
Charleston, South Carolina
Overheard by: Crash
Daddy: If you don't eat…
Three-year-old boy: You'll hit my butt? I like it when you hit my butt, it feels good on my super wee-wee!
Chick-fil-A
Columbia, South Carolina
Overheard by: Carrie
