Stores

Kid: Can we go yet? Why are we shopping for luggage here, anyway?
Mom: Because I'm leaving your father.

Department Store
Altamonte Springs, Florida

Overheard by: Voip

Toddler being towed by mom, bawling: But I want that to be my surprise now!

Convenience Store
Greenwich, Connecticut

Overheard by: Tyrone

Woman in cell phone store: I want to change the billing name on this account.
Employee: I'm sorry, we can't allow you to make changes on this account. You're not the primary account-holder.
Woman: Right. The primary account holder died.
Employee: I'm sorry, only the primary account-holder can make changes to the account.
Woman: He's dead!

Verizon Store
Grand Rapids, Michigan

Husband: How can women spend so much money on purses?
Wife: Shhh!

Coach Store
Pennsylvania

Yuppie boyfriend (excitedly): Let's have an Ashton Kutcher movie marathon night!
Yuppie girlfriend (whispering): Honey, we've already talked about this…

Blockbuster
San Francisco, California

Overheard by: Pallas

Employee: Hi, can I help you find anything?
Ghetto kid: Yeah, I'm looking for a book called Marijuana Horticulture.
Employee: Yeah, I know that book. I think we are out, though.

Bookstore
Stockton, California

Overheard by: Can I get some of that?

Mom: Honey, don't eat your boogers!
Two-year-old: But mommy, I like them!
Mom, exasperated: Go to your dad.

Supermarket
St. Louis, Missouri

Overheard by: Ryskie

Girlfriend, after guy has smacked her butt: This isn't Wal-Mart!

Target
Salem, Oregon

Six-year-old boy: I want flan. I want flan, mom. I want flan. I've never tried it before. Can we get flan?
Mother: Okay, you need to stop being so annoying.
Six-year-old boy: Maybe.

Supermarket
Northampton, Massachusetts

Overheard by: Adrienne

Girl: I wish I had a loving relationship with my feet.
Woman: What?
Girl: Oh my god, you're not my mom!

Shoe Store
Durham, North Carolina