I Just Hadn't Met the Right Transsexual

Store clerk: Oh yeah, karaoke. I used to be totally into that shit back when I was gay.

The Video Underground
Boston, Massachusetts

Overheard by: Sam

Posted on December 22, 2008
Compare and contrast, Default, Employees, Massachusetts, Memory lane, Music, Sexuality, Stores

Let's See If She'll Be Trying with You After This

Cute chick in line: Oh! I want Haribo gummi bears! I need a snack to study effectively. There are lots of things I don't do effectively without snacking.
Boyfriend: Maybe you should try snacking next time we have sex. You know, maybe a little popcorn…a candy bar…
Cute chick: Are you saying my sex isn't effective? Well, maybe there won't be a next time.
Boyfriend: You know, you're not responding very well to constructive criticism. The solution is to keep trying, not to give up.

CVS
University City, Philadelphia

Overheard by: justtryingtowaitinline

Posted on December 20, 2008
Advice, Compare and contrast, Couples, Default, Education, Girls, Guys, Insults, Pennsylvania, Sexuality, Stores, Wishes

Nah, They Know the Pecking Order

Bookseller to pregnant coworker: Aren't you worried there will be jealousy between the chickens and your unborn child?

Barnes & Noble
Augusta, Maine

Overheard by: Just browsing

Posted on December 16, 2008
Birds, Customers, Default, Feelings, Kids, Maine, Questions, Stores, Weirdness

The ACLU Defends the Constitution? What Kinda Commie Shit Is That?!

Volunteer #1: We can't be selling this music, it's devil worship.
Volunteer #2: Well, that's the ACLU. The ACLU ought to be abolished. They're why there's all this stuff around.
Customer: Why are you getting rid of that? Don't you think people ought to be able to choose for themselves?
Volunteer #2: Harry Potter is a witch!
Customer: I think we ought to get rid of Bush and Cheney, put them in jail–they're mass murderers!
Volunteers #1 & #2: (silence)

Joshua Tree Thrift Shop
California

Overheard by: Celeste Mann

Posted on December 1, 2008
California, Compare and contrast, Coworkers, Crimes, Customers, Default, Evil, Murder, Music, Politics, Religious fanatics, Stores, Weirdness

Please Join Mr. Morse and Mr. Braille in the Office

Woman over intercom: Attention, there is an emergency in the ladies' room. There are no more paper towels.
(customers in super long line snicker)
Man on intercom (a minute or two later): Attention Mr. Dewey, we have an emergency in the office. Nobody can understand your decimal system.

Trader Joe's
Washington, DC

Overheard by: Hungry

Posted on November 26, 2008
Coworkers, Default, Employees, Guys, Offers and requests, Office politics, Stores, Washington, DC, Weirdness, Women

Boys: I'm Keeping It in My Pants Now, Thanks Anyway

High school girl #1: I'm so glad I only have one baby daddy. I feel sorry for those girls with more than one! You've gotta figure out who has money and who doesn't.
High school girl #2: That is so true!

Grocery Store
Austin, Texas

Overheard by: Just doing my grocery shopping

Posted on November 26, 2008
Compare and contrast, Default, Feelings, Girls, Money, Relationships, Stores, Teens, Texas

…In Unrelated News

Preppy guy #1: “Pangaea,” like the continent?
Preppy guy #2: Yeah, my sister just had a face lift.

Wal-Mart
Austin, Texas

Overheard by: Rev Loon

Posted on November 24, 2008
Beauty, Default, Family ties, Geography, Guys, Preppies, Questions, Stores, Texas, Weirdness, Words

It's Almost Like You're Blaming the Victim Here

Guy, carrying basket: It's just hard to know that I did so much for her, I did everything right in our marriage and now she is intentionally trying to hurt me.
Girl, pushing cart: Seriously? You did everything right?
Guy: Yes, I did.
Girl: Um, you slept with me.
Guy: Yeah, but that was a long time ago and I didn't do it to hurt her.

Trader Joe's
Hillcrest, California