“My Hatred for Teaching Is Vast As the Ocean”

English teacher: Can anyone tell me what the definition of a simile is?
Student: Like your ass…
English teacher: What did you say!?
Student: Like or as?
English teacher: Oh…yeah.

St. Joesph High School
New Jersey

Overheard by: Davel

Posted on March 14, 2020
Compare and contrast, Default, Education, Insults, New Jersey, Questions, Students, Teachers, Words

I'm Afraid Library Regulations Dictate That I Must Give You a Wedgie

Librarian: Watcha doin'?
High school girl: Studying.
Librarian: Nerd.

Bellingham, Washington

Posted on March 12, 2020
Default, Education, Employees, Girls, Questions, Students, Washington, Words

This Reads Like a Seinfeld Line

College student: Everything in life can be related back to Seinfeld. It's like the bible, except it won't fail you.

Hookah Bar
Washington, DC

Posted on March 11, 2020
Bars & Clubs, Christianity, Compare and contrast, Default, Students, TV shows, Washington, DC

Something Grave, Anyway.

Catechism teacher: Where's Eric today?
Eric's friend: Eric's at the hospital with his mom.
Catechism teacher, concerned: Why?
Eric's friend: Cuz she has a tombstone, or something like that.

Rochester Hills, Michigan

Overheard by: Betsy

Posted on February 27, 2020
Education, Friends, Maladies, Michigan, Questions, Students, Stupidity, Teachers, Words

To Be Fair, I Only Saw Her a Little.

Psych professor: I dated a girl who was 4'10'' once, but she always insisted that that was the legal cutoff height for little people.
Psych student: Actually, I think 4'11'' is the cutoff.
Psych professor: What? I dated a midget?

Bennington, Vermont

Overheard by: laughing in class

Posted on February 19, 2020
Class, Default, Questions, Students, Teachers, Vermont, Weirdness, Words

Like the Sex-Ed DVD Abortion: Delicious, but Deadly

Female college student eating grapes: Look, it's a baby grape. And this one is like a grape fetus.
Roommate: What? Are there flavored fetuses?

Portland, Oregon

Overheard by: Larissa

Posted on February 8, 2020
Compare and contrast, Default, Friends, Fruit, Girls, Oregon, Questions, Students

Well, Your Ice Caps Are Melting

Student: So, the only way they won't kick me out of college is if I was diagnosed with a mental problem. Do you think I can pull off bipolar?

University of Wisconsin-Eau Claire

Posted on February 7, 2020
Colleges & Universities, Default, Education, Mental illnesses, Questions, Students, Wisconsin

This Concludes My Essay on “Who I Admire Most”

High school student: She’s a two faced bitch, but not in a bad way.

http://overheardlines.blogspot.com/2008/04/high-school-student-at-lowell-high.html

Overheard by: emily

Posted on February 5, 2020
Compare and contrast, Default, Insults, Overheard Lines, Students, Teens, Words

Yes, But It's Pronounced “Canadia”

Professor: Back then they actually had Hell located on the map. It was in the north.
Student: In Canada?

Hartford, Connecticut

Overheard by: Claire

Posted on January 12, 2020
Connecticut, Education, Geography, History, Questions, Religion, Students, Stupidity, Teachers

Prison Pretty Much Takes Care Of That, Anyway.

Teacher: So… then, what should happen to the guy?
Student #1: I think he should be sent to jail.
Student #2: I think that since he killed his neighbor, he should have to be killed himself. Get the death penalty. Ya know… “eye for an eye”.
Student #3: That's the stupidest thing in the world. It doesn't work in all situations.
Student #2: Yes it does! Let's say some guy molests a kid, then the guy should… (pause) Ok… Nevermind.

High School
Illinois

Posted on January 5, 2020
Compare and contrast, Crimes, Illinois, School [Elem., Middle, & High], Sex, Students, Stupidity, Teachers

Students