Little old lady, yelling to friend across the store: The world is flooded with Beanie Babies!
Wauwatosa, Wisconsin
Overheard by: Embarassed at how loud my friend laughed before walking away
Guy #1: If you told her you like sublime you could probably toss it in.
Guy #2: Yeah, I'd let her slob the knob just to see the four finger, cartoon hand grab.
http://overheardatlc.blogspot.com/2006/10/sublime-potent-aphrodisiac.html
Overheard by: tlc
Saleswoman: Have a nice day!
Irritated customer: I've already made other plans.
Jersey City, New Jersey
Overheard by: Steve
Professor: Here's a good thing to compare to the turgor pressure in a plant cell: have any of you seen an erection?
University of Illinois at Chicago
Overheard by: suddenly paying attention
College therapist to class: Now take deep, slow breaths. We don't want stress to take over, because stress means purple elephants.
Marquette, Michigan
Woman on intercom: Would Joe Smithson please report to the guidance office? (pause) Please? Seriously, please, please, please, just come… please.
High School
New Jersey
Overheard by: Miss Fabulous
Teacher: If there's a bee flying around the classroom, I don't want you to freak out. But, if you get stung by a bee, I want you to jump up, scream, run for the door, run into the door because you didn't open it, scream again, and run out. If you're going to disturb the class, we might as well get a laugh out of it.
Bristol, Vermont
Overheard by: Misaki
Professor, at 8 am: If coffee doesn't work, drink RedBull. But if that doesn't work, I suggest amphetamines or heroin.
Class, SUNY
Purchase, New York
Overheard by: Jessica
Daddy: If you don't eat…
Three-year-old boy: You'll hit my butt? I like it when you hit my butt, it feels good on my super wee-wee!
Chick-fil-A
Columbia, South Carolina
Overheard by: Carrie
Girl #1: I'll check back. I'll continue to burp regularly and tell you about it.
Girl #2: Please do.
Brock University
St. Catharines, Ontario
Canadia