Wishes

Teen girl to teen friends: I wish I was mixed race–not really black. I mean, you're brown all year round.

Nottingham
England

Overheard by: Johnny

Boy #1: So, I never got what the difference was between liberals and conservatives.
Boy #2: Well, conservatives like big business, and liberals like communism.
Boy #1: Oh. What if I want to be both?
Boy #2: You can't be both. It's an on/off thing. Like, you're either pregnant or you're not. Or like you're Christian or you're Islam.

High School
Minnesota

Eight-year-old boy: Mommy… I can't wait for my day of vengeance to be at hand.
Mother: I know he's unlikable, but there are quieter ways.
Eight-year-old boy, wielding stick in hand: I wanna use this.
Mother: He'll shush up if you put a bow and arrow through his eye.

MTA
Manhattan, New York

Overheard by: PatriotAhckt

Student: Is there really a job where you can just throw paper at people and then run away?

Canadia

Mom: So tell me the truth. Was that your pregnancy test dad found in the trash?
Daughter: Jesus Christ, mom! No!
Mom: Okay, well, I just wanted to…
Daughter, interrupting: I wish it was my test! At least then I'd be having a good time!

YMCA
Nashville, Tennessee

Girl, bitching to friend: She was scratching my piano! I wanted to throw her down the stairs!

Denver, Colorado

Overheard by: Soko

Loud girl on cell: No embalming for me! I just wanna rot!

National Zoo
Washington, DC

Overheard by: Joe

Red-headed woman: I wish they’d take this place and just plunk it down in New York so I could shove people.
Red-headed guy: Word!

National Museum of Natural History
Washington, DC

Overheard by: Nujju

Boy #1: Nobody wants to see that.
Boy #2: Yeah, that's nasty. Nobody wants to see that.
Boy #3: I want to see that.
Boy #2, after long pause: Yeah, me too.
Boy #1: Yeah, that would be pretty awesome to see.

High School
Texas

Teen girl: Being around you makes me want to talk about my bowel movements.

La Capilla
Torrance, California

Overheard by: J-dawg.