Little girl: Mom, what’s a prostitute?
Mother, nervous: Uh, a woman who does extreme cuddling for money.
Little girl: Extreme cuddling X Games?!
Denver, Colorado
Big dude on phone: Yeah, I am feeling better… I woke up at four a.m. this morning, but it’s okay — I’m taking that euthanasia stuff and it seems to be helping.
Tram, Victoria Street
Melbourne, Victoria
Australia
Overheard by: Louise
Girl #1: A baby exploded on me today.
Girl #2: Did you just say “exploded”?
Girl #1: Yeah.
Girl #2: Ew!
Milwaukee, Wisconsin
Girl on phone: Yeah, he couldn’t get it up, so we just watched Schindler’s List instead.
eavesdropdc.blogspot.com
Girl: T9 is responsible for so many mishaps. Once I tried to text someone “thanks for helping me”. Instead I typed “thanks for humping me.” It was bad!
Tacoma, Washington
Girl: I’ll have the chocolate peanut butter car crunch.
Cashier teenage boy: Ummmm… Yeah, the “car” actually stands for “caramel”.
Gelato Spot
Scottsdale, Arizona
Overheard by: Fake Blonde
White, middle aged music professor: I don’t do sevenths. Homie don’t play that.
Hartford, Connecticut
Overheard by: Claire
Irritated English professor: I think I'm just going to change all my paper assignments to “create an inscrutable utterance.”
Ursinus College
Pennsylvania
Guy: Egg salad is a dish best served cold.
http://overheardinumcp.blogspot.com
Overheard by: alyssa
Smart girl: Obviously ‘irregardless’ is the wrong word in the sentence.
Dumb girl: Why is that word wrong?
Smart girl: For starters, it’s not even a real word.
Dumb girl: Sure it is — I use it all the time.
Erie Community College
Orchard Park, New York
Overheard by: Smarty Pants
