Woman: I am your woman!
Man: I'm my own woman!
Kansas City, Missouri
Overheard by: David Wayne Reed
Ethics of video games professor: And that's why they stoned women in the middle ages. Brunette, whispering: I think he gets off on video games.
Blonde, whispering: Ham?
Brunette, whispering: Him!
Blonde, whispering: I am not a ham!
(both girls start laughing)
Professor: Excuse me?
DePaul University
Chicago, Illinois
Overheard by: Margo
Customer: Do you have any lox?
Wal-Mart employee: Of course. They're over in hardware.
Customer: No. Lox, like bagels and lox.
Wal-Mart employee: Lots? Lots of bagels?
Customer: I'll just go to Publix.
Wal-Mart
Nashville, Tennessee
Overheard by: Heading for Publix, too.
Guy #1: Put them in the back seat. I've got a bunch of junk in my trunk… Excuse the double meaning.
Guy #2: Double meaning?
Guy #1: I've got junk in my trunk.
Guy #2: I don't get it.
Guy #1: Never mind.
Kroger Parking Lot
Athens, Georgia
Student to teacher who just made a mistake finger-spelling on board: Finger!
Teacher, erasing board: If I had a nickel every time someone said that to me.
Hampden, Maine
Man: Does your thingy work down here?
Washington, DC
Flight attendant: And if you have smelly, I mean “small” children with you, you may disembark before other passengers. Thank you for flying Jetstar, we hope to see your ugly, I mean “lovely” faces again.
Jetstar Flight
Australia
Guy on cell: Look, I'm just saying. If he wants to play hardball, I'm totally prepared to show him just how hard my balls are.
http://community.livejournal.com/overheardatyork/47161.html
Overheard by: Jon
Girl: So I think he's taken our relationship a step further.
Gay friend: Oh! What, did he ask you out?
Girl: No.
Gay friend: Did he finally tell you he likes you?
Girl: No! Nothing like that.
Gay friend: Then what?
Girl: He started talking to me exclusively in D&D jargon!
Gay friend: See, this is why we have different tastes in men.
Burlington, Vermont
Overheard by: Doesn't play D&D
