Drunk girl in bar to bartender: You should be so lucky as to have sex with me.
Bartender: I wouldn’t fuck you for practice.
Richmond, Virginia
Overheard by: warm ups?
Drunk girl in bar to bartender: You should be so lucky as to have sex with me.
Bartender: I wouldn’t fuck you for practice.
Richmond, Virginia
Overheard by: warm ups?
Guy #1: How much have you had to drink?
Guy #2: Just beers.
Guy #1: But how many?
Guy #2: Just beers.
Guy #1: Yeah, how many beers have you had?
Guy #2: Yeah.
Guy #1: How many have you had though?
Guy #2: I’m only drinking beers tonight.
Pinehaven
New Zealand
Overheard by: Schmitty
Serious drunk guy: I made babies with a woman!
BrewFest
Jenkintown, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: Drunk Girl
Dude: Hey I’m Eddie*.
Chick: Yeah, I know. I’m Lauren*. We’ve met before.
Dude: Oh. Yeah. Well I just thought we should know each other’s name since we’re talking about anal.
The Beta Bar
Tallahassee, Florida
Overheard by: just here for the show
Slacker boy: I could tell she was really into me, because she told me, like, three times, how she had given up sex for lent.
PM’s
Nashville, Tennessee
Satisfied customer: They had bacon I would drop-kick a nun for.
Maggie’s
Toronto, Ontario
Canadia
Hoochie: I would never get my clit pierced there.
O’Bannon’s Bar
College Station, Texas
Irishman to friend, huddling under bar's awning during massive downpour: And people wonder why we drink…
Dublin
Ireland
Overheard by: l_tau
Guy: Where'd you go for lunch today?
Friend: Umm…I don't want to tell you.
Guy: Oh god, you went to Arby's, didn't you!
Friend, groaning: Yes.
Bar
Omaha, Nebraska
Drunk girl in bar during Rose Bowl: It's official–I'm going to be ovulating on my wedding day.
Chicago, Illinois
Overheard by: Double V
