Little girl, holding mannequin's hand: Daddy! Daddy! Look!
Dad: Is that your new mommy?
Little girl, singing: No! She doesn't have a head!
Coralville, Iowa
Little girl, holding mannequin's hand: Daddy! Daddy! Look!
Dad: Is that your new mommy?
Little girl, singing: No! She doesn't have a head!
Coralville, Iowa
Gay guy: Give me a sip of your drink!
Girl: No!
Gay guy: Give me a sip or I'll bite your cervix!
Military College
Georgia
Overheard by: Amanda
Surgeon: Hey, I need to change the big, sticky plastic dressing on your arm. Wanna go slow or do it in one fell swoop?
Patient, looking at dressing covering length of arm: Nahhh, that ain't gon' be no wonton soup…
Jamaica Hospital
Overheard by: MS3
Fun date #1: I hate it when guys want to cum on your face every time.
Fun date #2: Yeah, it gets in your eyes.
Fun date #1: And in your hair.
Fun date #3: Once in a while is okay, but not every time.
Outside Coffee Shop
Harrisonburg, Virginia
Overheard by: browny
Student to teacher who just made a mistake finger-spelling on board: Finger!
Teacher, erasing board: If I had a nickel every time someone said that to me.
Hampden, Maine
Slightly tipsy girl at party: Hi, I'm Liz. (pause) Oh, I like your ears.
Savannah, Georgia
Woman to another: She washes her pickles in a dishwasher.
Cub Foods
Minneapolis, Minneapolis
Restaurant waitress, ranting: If my family weren't here I would take my shoe off and stab you in the eye with it.
Saugus, Massachusetts
Orchestra director to French horn player: Can you just stick your fist up in there?
Luther College
Decorah, Iowa
Overheard by: percussionist who snorted like a 12-year-old
Boyfriend, pressing girlfriend's nose with thumb: Hmmm. I don't think I'd date you if you looked like this.
New Jersey
