Canadia

Guy going on holidays to friend: If the opportunity presents itself, could you please not fuck my girlfriend?

Vancouver
Canadia

Lounging suburban man to passers-by: Your kids look like they want to do the chicken limbo.

Toronto
Ontario
Canadia

Overheard by: The cool aunt

Teen girl: Macbeth… That’s the one with Hamlet, right?

Ottawa
Canadia

Professor: And so in REM sleep you'll get penile erection and vaginal lubrication. You know, the fun stuff. (class laughs) Well, your eyes aren't the only things that are moving!

York University
Toronto
Canadia

Overheard by: studious student

Middle-aged shopper: There’s something so disconcerting about being poked in the tits by a kitchen fork.

Edmonton
Alberta
Canadia

Overheard by: disgruntled shopgirl

Gay guy to another: Yeah, cuz there's nothing like listening to Americans talk about their feelings to let you know what's really going on in the world.

Starbucks
Edmonton, Alberta
Canadia

Guy: So, I had to sit through 90 minutes of Annie Lennox for work the other night. [Grimacing] They all idolize her in there, which I don’t get, because she’s a heterosexual.

Toronto, Ontario
Canadia

Overheard by: Meech

Little girl to dad: Daddy?
Dad: Yes?
Little girl: Why can't brothers and sisters get married?

Toronto
Canadia

Gay guy to female friend: Just because I have testicles doesn't mean I'm any less of a woman.

Saskatchewan
Canadia

Guy: … Because the pope touches himself. That’s my answer for the first question. That’s my answer to any question, really.

History class
Halifax, Nova Scotia
Canadia

Overheard by: Kaiti