Or He Was in This Porn I Once Saw.

Super gangster teen guy, looking at Victorian book: Yo, why there so many pictures from Greece and Rome?
Super gangster teen girl: Greek is in Rome!

Bedford
Nova Scotia
Canadia

Overheard by: Heather

Posted on August 7, 2009
Books, Canadia, Geography, Questions, Stupidity, Teens, Thugs

A Slope Made Slippery by Extra Butter

20-something chick, gravely: I'm having severe intrusive thoughts about buying a medium popcorn.
Friend: So go buy a popcorn.
20-something chick, gravely: No, you don't get it. I'm serious.

Vancouver
Canadia

Posted on August 7, 2009
Canadia, Chicks, Food, Friends, Sensory experiences, Stupidity

It'll Be a Nice Compliment to Your Bowel-Movement Streaming News Feed

Girl #1: I'll check back. I'll continue to burp regularly and tell you about it.
Girl #2: Please do.

Brock University
St. Catharines, Ontario
Canadia

Posted on August 3, 2009
Burping & farting, Canadia, Colleges & Universities, Girls, Weirdness

She Has Sex In Very Unusual Places

Crazy drunk lady, whispering: I think I got asbestos on my hands. (in louder voice) Or maybe it's sperm! Heeheeheeheeheehee!

Toronto
Ontario
Canadia

Overheard by: EdgingAwayFromHer

Posted on August 2, 2009
Canadia, Crazies, Cum, Drunks, Hands, Sensory experiences, Women

More Important Than You Knew

Brazilian guy to American: Pleeeeeaaase? Say it. Say it. Say “fucker de matriz” in English.
Brazilian girlfriend: He wants you to say (whispers) “motherfucker”.
American guy: Okay. (blandly) Motherfucker.
Brazilian guy: No! Like an American, please!
American guy: Huh? Oh, “muthafucka!”
Brazilian guy, laughing giddily and clapping: Yes! Yes! Muthafucka, excellent!

ViaRail Train
Canadia

Overheard by: Jim

Posted on July 30, 2009
Canadia, Couples, Foreigners, Insults, Offers and requests, Train, Wishes, Words

In Hindsight, the Bible Could Have Been a Lot Worse

Young teenage girl with pink furry boots, rainbow hair, and seven facial piercings: Hey, if you were god, what would you do?
Young teenage boy with shaggy hair, acne, and a little boy face: I'd kill my foster parents.
Young teenage girl, totally ignoring her friend's response: I would totally make the world flat, so we could travel just by folding it in half. Imagine how much time and money I would save everyone!

Packed Train during Rush Hour
Calgary, Alberta
Canadia

Posted on July 24, 2009
Canadia, Family ties, God, Money, Murder, Questions, Stupidity, Teens, Time Management, Train, Wishes

From Stephen King's The Passion Of Christine

Little girl: Where is Jesus?
Bored babysitter: Umm, I don't know… In your heart?
Little girl: Well, then guess what?
Bored babysitter: What?
Little girl: I'm going to punch him! (starts punching herself in the heart)

Toronto
Canadia

Posted on July 18, 2009
Babysitters, Body parts, Canadia, Feelings, Jesus, Kids, Questions, Violence

Nobody Who's Been to England Ever Has to Ask

Pretty tween girl, looking around on busy street: What's with all these ugly people taking up all the space?

Toronto
Canadia

Posted on July 13, 2009
Beauty, Canadia, Compare and contrast, Questions, Tweens

I'm Beginning to Suspect They're Not Twist-Off

Girl #1: Yeah, bananas cost less than apples.
Girl #2: No way, I'd totally choose apples over bananas.
Girl #1: Really? I'd choose bananas, they fill me up more.
Girl #2, thoughtfully: I can't open bananas.

Canadia

Posted on July 11, 2009
Canadia, Compare and contrast, Fruit, Girls, Money, Stupidity

…But, Um, the Essay Topic Was “My Favorite Pet”

College student #1: So I was thinking I was going to write about Hitler, and how he was like…bad?
College student #2: Totally.

Edmonton
Canadia

Overheard by: dumbfounded

Posted on June 30, 2009
Canadia, Education, History, Students, Stupidity