Chick #1: I’m glad we’re not dating anymore. He was tiring. He thought he was such a Don Juan, and I would have to pretend to be charmed by what he said.
Chick #2: Like, how do you mean?
Chick #1: Well, I told him that I thought sex should be special, and he comes back with the line, ‘Every day is special with you, Olivia*.’ I wanted to laugh in his face, but instead I was like, ‘Oh, that’s so sweet!’
Georgetown University
Washington, DC
Overheard by: they’re smarter than I thought
Upset girl to friend: Everything's not the way it should be, it's all wrong. I fail at life.
Friend: Oh, no, you don't fail at life! This is just one of those little things you will fix, along with other things you will fix, and in the end, you'll end up with a pile of little fixed things.
Christchurch
New Zealand
Overheard by: Julia
Chick on cell: There's withholding sex, and then there's withholding French fries.
Cleveland, Ohio
Chick, seriously: Corn's one of them slow motherfuckers.
Friend, upset: Whores.
Aurora, Colorado
Overheard by: Leevee
Large chick in group of students: I like science, music, dance, and you know what else I like? Anal.
Community College
Virginia
Chick #1: She's on a date with a French guy.
(pause)
Chick #2: I bet French cock is like an eclair.
University of Denver, Colorado
Chick: I think that I'm the gayest straight girl in the world.
Bakersfield, California
High maintenance chick #1: You know, the French quarter at Disney is so much better than this.
High maintenance chick #2: Yeah, right, huh? This place is so dirty!
French Quarter
New Orleans, Louisiana
Overheard by: yeah, that big storm and all…
Drunk chick: Haha, you're a cheeky queen.
Drunk queer: Don't call me a cheeky queen! I'm a dirty bitch!
Provincetown, Massachusetts
Hip-hop thug on train bursts out, to no one in particular: Fuck you, man!
(spits on floor) You don't like it, do somethin' 'bout it. (pause) You want my dick? You want to be on my dick?
(silence).
Chica sitting opposite: Who are you talking to?
(hip-hop thug mumbles)
Chica: I don't think anyone wants to be on your dick.
Boston, Massachusetts
