Drunk girl to hot guy in “if you lick them they will come”: Nice shirt!
Hot guy, turning around: How about you “come” with me tonight, baby?
Downtown Orlando, Florida
Drunk girl to hot guy in “if you lick them they will come”: Nice shirt!
Hot guy, turning around: How about you “come” with me tonight, baby?
Downtown Orlando, Florida
Hot burner chick: Our bar was busy until the fat naked guy showed up and scared everyone off!
Fat naked guy: I'm wearing Uggs!
Burning Man
Nevada
Overheard by: Eavesdropper
Girl #1: So what do you think of her boyfriend?
Girl #2: I can see his underwear through his pants.
Tapas Teatro
Baltimore, Maryland
Overheard by: Underwear Moderator
Girlfriend: I'm gonna get a black wig and a skirt, and I'm putting body-glitter on you and doing your hair like you're in 90210 and you're going as Edward. It'll be like ironic.
Boyfriend: I'm gonna put some mayonnaise on my pants and go as that “jizzed in my pants” guy.
Girlfriend: No, you're not.
Gainesville, Florida
Gay Australian cowboy: I just didn't want his cat seeing me naked.
Calgary
Canadia
Philosophy professor: A crisp cravat always gets me hot.
Wesleyan University
Bloomington, Illinois
Overheard by: ..Really?
Middle-aged matronly looking woman: Well, while we’re here I can get some of this stocking stuffer shit.
Walgreens
Chicago, Illinois
Whiny-voiced 20-something: My period showed up two days early and ruined my weekend plans with that guy I was seeing.
20-something with baby: My period showed up two weeks late, stuck me with this, and ruined my life. Pass me one of those shirts in a medium?
Springfield, Illinois
Overheard by: Katie F
Large black woman on cell: Girl! I’m tellin’ you, I don’t know where I gots them warts on my feets. But they nasty! I don’t want to give them to nobody else, so I brought me some lil’ socks, you know… Them cushy foots? Not like Earl, who goes barefoot all over the city with them mushroom funguses on his toes. His toenails be like baby powder! They all crumbly and shit.
Detroit Metro Airport
Detroit, Michigan
Overheard by: Trying not to barf (and glad I wore socks)
