Colleges & Universities

Philosophy professor: I can't say I would rather have M&Ms than strong feet.

SUNY Purchase
Purchase, New York

Overheard by: Seth

Psychology professor: What will your Prada bag get you? It doesn’t get you sex. All the men aren’t going to be like, ‘Oooh, Prada bag!’

Northwestern University
Evanston, Illinois

Guy playing magic card game with a bunch of friends: All I’m saying is that somewhere, in an alternate universe, there is a table producing coffee!

Clark College
Vancouver, Washington

Professor: You just need to expose yourself! That's how you better yourself!

Middle Tennessee State Univ
Murfreesboro, Tennessee

Overheard by: Libby K.

Professor: So, I can see that some of you try to care about my feelings, and others don't give a fig.
Student #1: Whoa! Could you not use such harsh vegetables?
(entire class goes silent)
Student #2: I didn't know a “fig” was a vegetable.
Student #3: I thought it was a grape. A dried grape.

Johnson & Wales University
Providence, Rhode Island

Evolution professor: So why can't humans have more then just two sexes? Man, that'd be a lot of fun, wouldn't it?
Class: (uncontrollable laughter)
Evolution professor: Oh, I can see. (pause) I shouldn't have said anything, let's continue…

UC
Santa Cruz, California

Overheard by: I'm glad he said it

Student #1: I told my dad I wanted to be famous, and he told me I should kill someone. I was like, seven.
Student #2: At least he's supportive.

Philedelphia University, Pennsylvania

50-something clipboard guy: Excuse me miss, do you have just a couple minutes for campus international?
Girl: Sorry, I don't believe in other countries.

University of Minnesota

Overheard by: Cornielius

Physics professor: Nature doesn't care what you think.

De Anza College
Cupertino, California

Overheard by: shyinvisiblegirl loves physics

Sensitive soul: Why would I fuck you if you have a rash?

Dining Hall, Stony Brook University
Stony Brook, New York

Overheard by: Slightly amused but scared