Employee #1: Are you filling in for Jane*?
Employee #2: Yeah, is she okay?
Employee #1: Yeah, she's all right. Apparently her stalker's in town so she just had to go to the precinct and file all these reports.
Employee #2: Jane* has a stalker? That is fabulous and terrifying all at once.
Yoga Studio
Manhattan, New York
Stoner #1: Hey, have you seen Jim* lately?
Stoner #2: No, man, I don't hang out with him no more.
Stoner #3: Why not?
Stoner #2: He kept stealing my Skittles!
Public Library
Eugene, Oregon
Confused elderly female patient, trying to punch staff: If you kill me, my family will hunt you down and take all your money!
Nurse's aide, trying to clean up patient: Yeah, we hear that a lot.
Hospital
Burlingame, California
Overweight middle-aged woman, about infant crying non-stop: Oh my god, seriously, somebody just kill it.
Target
Norman, Oklahoma
Guy #1: My boss, who's a Shaolin monk, told me if I saved his school, he'd pay off my loans. He was like “I pay off 1.5 million dollar debt!” and then, for a while, I was dealing with the Russian mafia, so I've been pretty busy.
Guy #2: Man… Your life is like a movie. It's like Karate Kid 15 or something.
Tulane University
New Orleans, Louisiana
Overheard by: iwouldtotallywatchthatmovie
Strange girl: I'm so happy I live in Canada. If I lived anywhere else, I'd probably be in jail.
Norman Wells
Canadia
Overheard by: Tobac
Deli worker : Hey, do you got a pen that works?
Colleague: Nah, I must have dropped mine in the parking lot after I stabbed someone with it.
Long Island, New York
Older woman on phone: June* is in jail right now, but she'll be into work a little later.
http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/overheardinminneapolis/~3/349982709/hopefully-following-a-shower.html
Overheard by: o_o
Middle-age woman to friend: We're smuggling beer! We're smuggling beer!
Fisherman's Wharf
San Francisco, California
Guy: This macaroni and cheese tastes like prison.
Davenport, Iowa
Overheard by: Don
