Guy on cell, standing in vegetable aisle and staring at grocery list: Honey, I see red, greed, yellow, and orange peppers, but they don't have black ones. (pauses, then, sounding irritated) Well, why didn't you tell me they were with the spices? Wait… how do they keep them cold there? Is that even safe?!
Anderson, Indiana
Hobo to girls: Oh, ladies, I like the way your skirts move. (girls look disgusted) Sorry, I can't help it if I'm a lesbian.
Olympia, Washington
Overheard by: Sticking with pants
Middle-aged black woman to husband: Baby, you remember that time I shot you?
CVS
Indianapolis, Indiana
Old man in hospital bed, to family: I've said it once, and I'll say it again. Tigers are the sharks of the land!
Poughkeepsie, New York
Young guy on cell: You got a bikini wax?… Really?… How come you never did that when we were together?… Oh, so you’re a woman now?
7-Eleven
Edmonton, Alberta
Canadia
Gay guy #1, walking down the street: Oh, this place is cute. Your parents should stay here when they visit.
Gay guy #2: That's a funeral home.
Market Street
San Francisco, California
Overheard by: Ray
Boy: So why did you move here?
Girl: I was gonna go to art school and then I wrote this big essay and my cat shit on it.
Boy: Literally shit on it?
Girl: Yeah, I took it as a sign.
18 Bus
Seattle, Washington
British theater professor: Well, you know Hong Kong used to belong to Britain. (angrily) Everything used to belong to Britain.
Theater Class, UMass
Amherst, Massachusetts
Overheard by: Chanimal
Man #1, watching rhino: Damn, it's huge.
Man #2: Lucky bastard.
San Diego Zoo
San Diego, California
Overheard by: Nikki
